


we break but we're not broken

by dis_connected



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, F/F, Lesbian AU, Pining, Smut, Useless Lesbians, cis girl au, pov aquaria, smut courtesy of bertie and her bees
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-05-29 12:13:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15072917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dis_connected/pseuds/dis_connected
Summary: Aquaria cares far too much for her friends.Inspired by this prompt from happylilprompts on tumblr: Person A has had a crush on Person B, literal sunshine that gets top grades, for years. Recently B smiles and studies less, and is even skipping class. A’s the only one who pays close enough attention to see something is seriously wrong au





	1. Part One - Concern

**Author's Note:**

> Big ole thanks to @bertie-bees because without her I would have given up on this shit, and it would be even shitter  
> Also, just so you know, the thing with the public leisure centre I know sounds weird, but that is what my actual school had, so the school is literally based off of mine.

         Aquaria has given up with school. Well, she gave up with school not long after she started school. But, still, _officially_ now, all she’s doing is focusing on trying to get into the Fashion Institute of Technology, which has been her only dream since she tried on her first pair of her mom’s heels as a kid, and now she’s just trying to keep all her grades at a C so she can successfully scrape by high school and leave it all behind for good.  

Meanwhile, a friend of hers, Brianna, is a model pupil. Aquaria has sat behind her in both History and French since freshman year, watching the way she flicks her blonde hair over her shoulder, how her head tilts back when she’s laughing and her confidence when talking in class in comparison to Aquaria’s stumbling awkwardness. Not that it’s a big deal that she watches her. She’s just hard to miss, with her big personality and even bigger hair, and you know, she’s _right there_ , what else is she supposed to look at?

Brianna is popular amongst the students, like Aquaria, but, drastically opposite to Aquaria, she’s also loved by all of her teachers, thanks to her general friendliness and attitude to study hard in all her subjects. Brianna has truly excelled in high school. As their four years come to a close, she’s on track to go to a great college and have a great future, whereas Aquaria can hardly wait to get out of this hellhole and _finally_ make a name for herself in fashion.

But, leaving behind high school means leaving her friends, and, unfortunately, that includes leaving behind _Brianna_. And the back of her head. Which _is_ nice. The big, curly hair that the blonde does when she has a bit more time is Aquaria’s favourite, by far. She remembers vividly the day that she did it for the first time.

It’s a Monday. Aquaria spent the weekend in isolation from the outside world, trying to put together some looks for her portfolio, which she has changed and altered a million times, at least. Just last night, she redrew and redesigned a whole outfit she was obsessed with the week before, meaning she was up until the early hours of the morning furiously scribbling, sketching and sewing until her fingers were red raw.

Now, she’s sitting in her assigned seat at the back of Madame Dupont’s class as it starts, her pen tapping on her desk and her eyelids starting to droop already. Concentrating on the boring lectures on the imperfect subjunctive is hard enough as it is, without the added bonus of just two hours sleep. Aquaria is so tired that she hasn’t noticed that Brianna isn’t already sitting in front of her until she walks in, five minutes late, shooting an apologetic smile to the teacher and the usual grin to Aquaria, and hurriedly making her way to seat, the second row from the back.

“Bonne matin, mademoiselle, et qu’est-ce que la raison que vous êtes si tard?” Madame Dupont demands before she has the chance to sit down, even though the lesson has barely begun.

“Je suis desolée, Madame,” Brianna mumbles, her flawless accent still clear as she sits down and starts to pull out her things.

Aquaria is shocked. Brianna has never been late to class before, especially not French. Normally, she has to drag Aquaria by the arm so they’re on time, or she’s already there by the time the other girl decides to finally trudge into the room at the last possible minute, looking eager for whatever boring grammar shit they’ll be looking at.

“Et pouvez-vous conjuguer le verbe faire au conditionnel pour la classe?” The teacher continues. Brianna does so, perfectly of course, but she seems tired to Aquaria, who stares at the back of her friend’s head with worry.

Obviously, she’s just looking out for her friend, as she would any of them. Aquaria knows that Monét threw a party that she had to decline thanks to her portfolio work, and Brianna most likely went to it, or slept through her alarm, or would rather not be here, which is fair enough, but she still can’t help but worry.

Aquaria almost has to slap herself, as Madame Dupont starts to drone on about when to use the imperfect subjunctive (which is _never_ in real life. Seriously who needs this?). She tells herself that she’s just looking for something to think about in this dull, dull class, and Brianna being late and tired has literally zero significance. People are allowed to be late sometimes, even Brianna. So, she just watches her as she twirls her hair around her finger, hair that she’s just shoved up in a ponytail without even brushing it. Not that she doesn’t look nice, _still_ , annoyingly.

The class manages to end with no incident, and thankfully Aquaria is one of the few not called on for Madame Dupont’s never-ending questions, because she wouldn’t have had a single clue what the hell to answer. She never really does.

She’s packing up to go at the end, grumbling to herself, when Brianna turns around, like she normally does to catch up with her friend after class, but today a frown is furrowing her features, as she looks right at the other girl, who does a slight double take at her unusually sad demeanour.

“Hey, Aqua,” Brianna says, slinging her bag over her shoulder and leaning forward on her friend’s desk.

“Hi, Bri, how was Monét’s?” Aquaria asks casually, trying to pretend that she isn’t worried as she shoves her notebook in her own bag carelessly, too tired to give a shit about the state of it.

“Oh, I dunno, I didn’t go,” Brianna seems uninterested. “Do we have history today?”

“Um, no, not until third tomorrow,” Aquaria replies, a little shocked at the unusual bluntness from her friend.

Okay, something’s definitely wrong. Brianna knows her timetable off by heart, she always has done. Aquaria tries not to think too much of it, but it stays on her mind the whole day. She’s ferociously munching her salad at lunch, sat with her friends on their regular table and staring into space as they talk about what happened at the party she didn’t go to.

Brianna is strangely absent; usually, she’s the heart of the table, always cracking the jokes and puns and causing their table to be the nosiest in the cafeteria, but today, though the noise of the girls screaming about the party is extremely prominent, one voice is missing. Well, two, but Aquaria’s quietness is never that unusual. Nobody else has commented on the lack of Brianna, which annoys Aquaria slightly, but also makes her think she’s kind of making a big deal out of nothing, so she says nothing, continuing to eat her salad.

She notices after a while a drop in chatter and a shift in atmosphere and looks up at everyone.

They’re all looking at their friend aggressively stabbing a poor lettuce leaf with her fork like she has a personal vendetta against it, concern and amusement etched across their faces.

“Um, Q, are you planning on eating your salad, or murdering it?” Blair, Aquaria’s best friend, asks her, laughing slightly.

“Sorry,” she mumbles in reply simply, rolling her eyes as the focus remains on her.

“What’s eating you, bitch? Your portfolio?” Vixen, the most blunt and unabashed of the group, asks. Everyone knows the stress that Aquaria has put herself under; her whole life has basically boiled down to this portfolio that is supposed to showcase who she is as a person, and, more importantly, a designer. To say there has been tears shed would be saying the least.

Aquaria puts down her fork and pushes her salad away, no longer hungry. “I’m bored. You’re all boring,” she jokes, rolling her eyes again, a trademark of hers.

“Well, sorry you’re too focused on your career to come to the best party of senior year,” Monet cheers.

“Actually, bitch,” argues Asia. “The best party of senior year was definitely my pool party right before school started!”

“Hah, that was before school started so it was technically it was a _summer_ party and not in senior year, so I win!” Monét laughs back loudly.

Aquaria stops listening. This argument is a regular occurrence between Asia and Monét, who constantly keep a friendly competition with each other. Their group has a specific dynamic, especially as they happen to be the most popular girls in the school, not that Aquaria really cares that much. She’s definitely not a people person.

Each girl in the group seems to have a specific, unspoken role and dynamic, and somehow they all create a powerful sort of clique. There’s no room for anyone else, not that Vixen would let them in anyway, unless they proved themselves to her, a task which few have ever succeeded at.

Which is why Aquaria notices so much when someone is missing, it doesn’t matter who. Just because it’s Brianna now that she’s worrying about, doesn’t mean that if, say, Kameron was acting differently next week she wouldn’t be just as worried about her. Aquaria cares about her friends, so what?

_So what?_

The week continues in pretty much the same way as Monday. Aquaria picks up on the subtle differences in Brianna, including her lateness to most of her classes, and her lack of makeup. To most people, it’s not a big deal at all, and she could blame it on the stress of nearing the end of the year. In fact, that’s what it would look like to _any_ other person but Aquaria, especially the rest of their friendship group which have failed to notice the shift in Brianna’s behaviour.

God, she is going _insane_. She starts to drive herself crazy, overanalysing Brianna’s _every_ move, from the back of her head in class, which is unusually slumped and bent over, to her weak attempts at jokes and uncharacteristic quietness at lunchtime, to the bluntness of their normally flowing conversation. It’s ridiculous, and distracting. _Especially_ because none of their other friends have mentioned anything, at least not to Aquaria, and she really doesn’t want to bring anything up for fear of looking like a total idiot.

The worry is crippling to Aquaria, as though somebody is repeatedly whacking her over the head with a huge stick. Every time she tries to forget about it, bam and it’s back. She knows it’s ridiculous, and she blames her own stress. Her mind is clearly looking for something to do, bored to death of her sewing, sketching and designing the same pieces over and over again. It’s insanity. Complete and utter insanity.

But on Thursday, her insanity is justified, just slightly; after the class get a test back in History and Aquaria peers over to see she did _better_ than Brianna, she can tell it’s with due reason. Brianna studies hard. Brianna puts school before everything. Brianna never gets below a B. In _anything_. And here she is with a C-, not even looking that fazed by it.

It’s like she’s given up. It’s eating away at Aquaria’s brain, so much so that she starts to design a new garment inspired by melting flesh and a revealed skull, and then hates it and screws it all up again. She wants to know _why_ , without having to ask her. Confrontation is not her strong suit, especially when she could be completely wrong.

She’s hanging out at Blair’s house on Thursday night, an excuse to use her mom’s sewing machine, which is a million times better than her own, to test out some material she found that she wants to work with, but it keeps going wrong.

Aquaria is a good seamstress. She prides herself on it, in fact. It’s her _thing_. But after she fucks up the hem for the millionth time, she screams and rips apart her fabric, throwing it in the air in the most dramatic fashion ever.

Blair looks up from her laptop, where she’s trying to complete some homework, concern and worry etched onto her face as she witnesses her best friend’s outburst.

“Um, are you okay?” she asks, knowing that Aquaria is someone that tends to bottle up her emotions, not scream and throw things like an overgrown toddler.

“I’m just stressed about this whole portfolio shit, I need it to be _perfect_ ,” Aquaria lies, rubbing her forehead aggressively.

“Lie,” says Blair nonchalantly, closing her laptop lid and moving to sit beside her best friend, who is trying desperately to stop her eyes from watering.

“Excuse me?” Aquaria says timidly, not looking her friend as she blinks furiously down at the sewing machine.

“You’ve been stressed about this for months. And when you’re stressed you turn it _out_ , not fuck it up. Something else is on your mind and you’re telling me what it is right now,” Blair demands. Aquaria sighs heavily.

“You’ll think I’m stupid.”

“If it’s got you this worked up, it can’t be stupid. Spill! Spill!” Blair starts chanting and it almost puts a smile on Aquaria’s face, who pushes her friend playfully to get her to shut up.

“Okay, fine, Jesus. I’m just worried about a friend of ours who I think there’s something wrong with. She’s just acting really weird and I’m wondering if she’s okay,” she mumbles, trying to play it off as no big deal, which it probably isn’t.

“Who is this?” There’s a long pause whilst Aquaria stares down at her manicured nails in shame. “Aquaria, _who_?”

“Brianna.”

“Oh for god’s – you can’t let her ruin this for you. I know you’re obsessed with her-”

“Woah, woah, wait a minute, I am not _obsessed_ with her. She got a C- today, B,” Aquaria says dramatically, like that’s supposed to clear everything up. Blair seems unbothered.

“So what?”

“ _So what?”_ Aquaria repeats in disbelief, annoyed at the lack of reaction. “This is Brianna. She always gets A’s.”

“Q, I love you, but I don’t think that Brianna getting a C- on _one_ test should be the focus of your little brain right now,” Blair says, gesturing to Aquaria’s sketches that are now littering her room, along with the torn bit of fabric. “Have you even talked to her about it?”

“Well, _no_ , but she’s not really given me much of a chance. We’re not exactly super close anymore, are we?” Aquaria feels her throat close up a little, before shaking her head, her friend giving her a pitying look.

“If it stops you worrying, just grab her after class and ask her if she’s okay. It’s really not hard, babe, it’s just being a good friend, and I’ll bet she’ll be happy to know you’re thinking of her.”

“Okay, I’ll talk to her,” Aquaria mumbles, choosing to ignore the last statement, knowing it probably won’t help, especially as she’s the fucking worst at giving advice.

“Okay?” Blair asks, receiving a reluctant nod in reply from her friend, who picks up her material from the floor in shame.

Aquaria knows how she feels about Brianna isn’t just friendly. She _does_. Blair might be her best friend, and Monét might be Brianna’s, but they’ve known each other a long time, longer than any of the other girls in their friendship group.

Aquaria recalls the day they met, almost ten years ago. She was always left out and picked on by the other kids; they thought she was way too weird and stupid, always laughing at the things she said and how she acted, which is a huge deal when you’re eight. Aquaria hated them all, and hated school. And then, a new girl moved to Aquaria’s town, and started at the school.

She had the biggest, kindest brown eyes that Aquaria had ever seen, and made it her mission to befriend the quirky girl who preferred to be alone. She sat down next to her whilst all the other kids went out to play, and handed her half her sandwich without a second word.

And that was that.

And then they grew back apart again, after a night which left Aquaria in tears, and unable to look her former best friend in the eye for months. They remained friends, tied together by mutual friends and mutual classes, but it’s nothing like it used to be.

So they’re not the closest of friends, not anymore, but the conversation still comes naturally and easily, they can laugh together without it being awkward, and pick up wherever they left off. Aquaria’s quite an awkward person, but Brianna feels like someone who will never judge or ridicule her, who she can always come to for any sort of advice.

Feelings have been brewing under the surface for Aquaria for years now, of course she knows that, she’s just been pretending they’re not there, because a harmless crush is pointless when Brianna has no interest in her in the slightest. Her act of indifference has most people convinced, everyone except for Blair, who can see right through the paper-thin charade and has been teasing her best friend about it ever since.

Aquaria tries not to care. She can admire Brianna in class and be her friend the rest of the time. It’s not that hard, really. It’s not.

Aquaria has French the period before lunch on Friday, so she plans on grabbing Brianna after the class so they can have some time to talk. Her plan, however, is foiled when the blonde doesn’t even show up.

Aquaria spends the whole class sick with worry, unable to concentrate on her work, her nails tapping the surface of the desk rapidly, staring at the door and expecting her friend’s face to poke around it at any second, an apologetic smile pulling at her plump lips. Her mind is in overdrive, and it feels like everything is going off track.

As soon as class is over, she starts to walk to lunch slowly, pulling out her phone and calling her friend once, twice, three times with no reply. Aquaria rakes her hand through her black hair, almost clawing at her scalp with her long nails.

She needs to calm down. Brianna is probably sick, and that’s why she’s off school, and sleeping, and that’s why her phone is left unanswered. Something in the back of Aquaria’s mind is still buzzing, however, drowning out her attempts to reassure herself and filling her mind with anxiety, like the sea pulling her under on a stormy day.

So, she bypasses the cafeteria and heads instead straight to her locker. Aquaria takes a second to linger over the polaroids decorating the inside of the door, adorned with stickers and hearts drawn sloppily in black sharpie. They’re mostly of herself and Blair, though it’s closely followed by some of her favourites of her and Brianna throughout their ten years of up-and-down friendship, as well as the other girls that Aquaria is friends with, group selfies and candid shots from parties and movie nights. Her eyes stop on a picture the summer before she started high school, of her and Brianna lounging by a pool, goofy grins on their faces, their bodies clad in bikinis. They had been so excited, buzzing with nervous energy about the adventures of high school that were to come.

Aquaria shakes her head and grabs her gym bag, slamming her locker shut and cutting off her thoughts of a simpler time, before she realised what a hellhole this place actually is, and what the hell it did to her friendship.

She storms through school like a lady on a mission. No matter what, Aquaria can always calm herself down through a vigorous dance session, pushing her body to the limit until she’s drenched in sweat and her only thought is of a shower.

She has a free period next, so she changes quickly, shooting a quick text to the group chat to let them know what she’s up to, planning to use all the time she can get to try to push the ridiculous thoughts of Brianna from her mind, at least for a little bit.

The high school is attached to a leisure centre, which the students use themselves in classes, but is open to the general public also, therefore the students have access to private rooms they can use to practise sports, as the public do, considering they pay.

Aquaria makes use of this any time she can, choosing the smaller rooms any time she can to practise her dance in peace.

Aside from a class playing volleyball in the gym, the area is empty as Aquaria walks back to the changing rooms, every single muscle in her whole body screaming out in pain. She loves to push herself or she feels like there’s no point in trying, but today she obliterated the limit, only stopping when her throat screamed for water and her lungs screamed for air.

It worked, as well, as she soaks herself in the scalding water of the shower, her mind is taken up by the success of her session and not a certain blonde. As the heat from the water cascades over her body, she lets her mind empty of all thoughts, closing her eyes against the surprisingly decent stream of water and takes her time washing her body, allowing herself to be at peace for just a while.

Finally, Aquaria steps out of the shower, grabbing a towel to wrap around her glistening body, water droplets sliding off her back. The changing rooms are empty, therefore she is free to take her time to dry herself with the scratchy material of the towel from her gym bag, not quite ready to face the outside world yet.

She still has half of the period left before the next class starts, so, after redressing and pulling her damp hair into a careless messy bun, she decides to head to the library. Not to do school work, of course, just to flip through the latest issue of Vogue in search of inspiration.

Aquaria is happily walking up to her locker through the deserted hallways of the school, feeling surprisingly refreshed, her usually busy mind feeling almost new again, before it will be undoubtedly hit with a new tidal wave of thoughts. Her locker is up in the music block, as that’s where she has homeroom, and she’s just walking past one of the soundproof practise rooms when she happens to glance inside, through the glass panel in the door, and spots a familiar face, distorted by the glass, but familiar all the same.

Brianna.

She’s sitting at the far end of the tiny room, with her feet propped up on a chair, her head bent over a guitar, and she appears to be singing something. Aquaria inches carefully closer to the door, watching her friend who is oblivious to her presence. She looks so _sad_.

Brianna has always loved music, Aquaria knows that. She taught herself how to play the guitar at a young age, and constantly came up with little melodies and songs that went with them, getting her best friend to chip in on the harmonies once in a while. But, to Aquaria’s knowledge, she hasn’t played in a while. And here she is, when she should probably be in class, strumming her old guitar, distinguishable by the old band stickers that faded a long time ago, and the dent from the time Aquaria dropped in on her wooden floor, by accident

And then Brianna looks up, and spots Aquaria standing in the doorway holding a gym bag and a concerned gaze, and lifts her hand up in a sort of half-hearted wave, getting up and placing the battered guitar down. She goes over to the door where Aquaria is frozen in a sort of silent embarrassment at being caught, and opens it.

“Hi,” Brianna says simply, before walking back into the room and retaking her seat.

Aquaria supposes that this as an invitation, and cautiously enters the room, shutting the door softly behind her, before perching on the piano stool close to where her friend is sitting. She studies her face for a second, all the worry and anxiety that she just worked so hard to get rid of flooding back and smacking her across the head again.

“What are you doing? Are you okay, Bri?”

At least she can finally talk to Brianna, again, and settle the matter for good, but the response from her friend is not at all what she’s expecting, her sad brown eyes lifting up to gaze into her own, her mind clearly occupied by something that has been pressing down on her for a while.

“What happened to me and you?”

It feels like a slap across the face, a cold, hard slap with a wet fish. That’s not even dead. And covered in slime.

“What do you mean?” Aquaria’s mouth feels dry, so she runs her tongue across her lower lip, which helps very little. She knows exactly what she means.

“We used to be _best friends_ , Aqua. We were inseparable. Don’t you remember us sharing everything? I stayed at your house, like, every other night. What the fuck went wrong?” Brianna is angry now, and it takes Aquaria by surprise – it’s a rare emotion in the usually laid back, easy going and happy girl that she used to know so well.

“We’re still friends,” Aquaria mumbles, though it’s a poor attempt at reassurance. Is this what’s been weighing down on Brianna the last week? Surely it _can’t_ be? And yet, a small part of Aquaria’s heart, dedicated to Brianna, lights up in hope that it could be.

“Yeah, _great_. I can’t remember the last time I was alone with you. When did we last hang out that wasn’t at fucking lunchtime?”

It hurts. It really fucking hurts. Aquaria’s chest feels like it’s closing in on her. Brianna doesn’t remember. She doesn’t remember the fatal night that caused Aquaria to distance herself from Brianna, gradually, slowly, because the more time she spent with her, the more it hurt, like a dagger twisted into her chest, plunging deeper as the days, weeks, months passed. She _had_ to get it out, even if that meant the end of their friendship, which it almost did.

She sure as hell isn’t going to bring it up.

“I know,” she says instead, shaking her head, hoping that the hurt she feels hasn’t seeped into her voice. “You know I still care about you. Which is why I want to know what’s been going on with you?”

“Don’t change the subject!” Brianna groans, clearly uncomfortable at what she knows Aquaria is about to bring up.

“Bri, you got a C and didn’t even care. You missed _French_ , and you’re in _here_ in a free period! I’m not crazy, something is the matter,” Aquaria says, mostly to reassure herself. There’s a long pause, as Brianna appears to be thinking something over, painfully slowly. Aquaria chews at the inside of her cheek anxiously, enough so that the metallic taste of her own blood seeps into her mouth

“Well, okay,” Brianna says, at last, looking up at Aquaria with a small, sad smile on her face. “Maybe you can help me. I could use your advice.”

“You know I’m shit at advice. You _do_ know I’m shit at advice?” Aquaria says. If Brianna remembered who she was _at all_ she would know that, but the girl just shakes her head, looking at Aquaria as if she holds a cure for all her troubles.

“I think you’re my best bet, right now.”

There’s something about this statement that makes Aquaria extremely nervous, the worry now pounding through her mind, amplified to a million times to what it was before, but how the hell can she refuse _now_?

“Um, okay, I’ll try my best.”

“I’ve been, sort of, realising some _things_ about myself recently.”

“Things?”

There’s a long, painful, drawn-out pause. Brianna can’t even look at Aquaria, who’s staring at her so intensely she might possibly be about to burn a hole through her skull.

“Like, maybe I’m not actually straight?”

Oh. That was not what Aquaria was expecting, at all. She almost chokes on air, trying her best to maintain a neutral disposition as she nods encouragingly, willing Brianna to continue as her mind starts whirring at a million miles an hour. Is this about her? Can she _possibly_ dare to hope that it is?

“You’re… gay?”

“Maybe, _god_ , I don’t know. I haven’t talked to a single person about this yet.”

God, that feels like old times. A bittersweet wave of nostalgia washes over Aquaria. Sitting up for hours and blurting any random thing that they could ever possibly think of. No secrets, no lies. Come to think of it, Brianna did once say that she had an unexplainable crush on the groovy chick girl that adorned her bedding as a kid.

“I just feel so lost, all of a sudden. I’m eighteen years old and I’m only just figuring out that I like girls?”

“Hey, that’s not that old. People don’t figure it out until college normally.”

Brianna laughs, though it’s painfully bitter, shaking her head in amusement, causing her friend to smile, just slightly.

“See, bad advice! What did I tell you?”

“I just can’t stop thinking about it, like, it’s keeping me up at night. And I have to avoid _her_ , which is where you come in.”

“What?”

“Well, she made me realise I like girls at all. I have a huge, ridiculous crush on her.”

“ _Who_ , Bri?”

“Blair.”

And, just like that, the world comes crumbling down.


	2. Part Two - I do declare...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Blair St. Clair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Sorry it's been so long, I've been away and then desperately trying to claw at any shred of motivation possible. But, I've got a vague plan for this thing now, so updates should hopefully be a lot more regular. I will say if you hate angst then I suggest you stop reading now...  
> To remind you, the little squad I'm using consists of Vixen, Monét, Kameron, Asia, Blair and of course Aquaria and Cracker (Brianna). All these girls will play a key role in the bringing together of our relationship as the work progresses. Kameron's is by far my least favourite, but for now, let's focus on Blair.  
> Also, I done fucked up because I was looking at FIT and the applications are supposed to be in by February, but this is fiction not real life so just ignore that lmao. Okay, I will shut up now. Enjoy the chapter!

Aquaria doesn’t care for popularity. She’s not particularly outgoing, and she doesn’t ever really talk to people that she doesn’t know, disregarding a friendly smile or polite hello. She loves all her friends, so much, but she wouldn’t care less if they were the least popular girls in the school.

She has a few friends, from school, that she likes to talk to in her classes, such as Vanessa who she sits by in English, and Monique who never fails to make her laugh in gym.

She likes the order of it all, the safety and comfort of knowing who her friends are and the particularities of their group, where they all fall with each other and the unique bond she has with each of them. Aquaria doesn’t enjoy change, or disruption, and high school has been so familiar to her for the last four years.

Which is why, when Blair’s name leaves Brianna’s lips, her mouth turns dry. That’s the _only_ reason, that it would mess everything up. She knows who Blair is to her, and she knows who Brianna is to her. She doesn’t really want that to change, not this way.

It’s a joke. It _has_ to be a joke, right?

There’s no way Brianna likes Blair. Aquaria can’t even picture them together, so she just sort of sits there like an idiot, in shock.

“Aquaria? What should I do?”

Brianna’s talking to her, chewing the skin around her nails nervously, so she has to reply, but her throat has suddenly closed up and her mouth is drier than the Sahara, so she swallows the little saliva she has, running her tongue across her lower lip before glancing up at Brianna, who is looking at her with a mixture of embarrassment and desperation, clearly relying on her to respond.

“Um,” says Aquaria, after what feels like a horribly long pause, her voice coming out croaky and feeble despite her best efforts to sound unabashed. “I don’t know that she’s even gay. She’s never mentioned anything about liking girls.”

It’s true, and maybe it’s best to be honest, but the way that Brianna’s face falls has her regretting the statement all the same.

“You think I could win her over?” she says, staring at Aquaria as though she has the answers to all of life’s problems, which is incredibly unlikely seeing as she struggles to solve her own.

Aquaria’s mind is in overdrive again, as usual, it would seem, when it comes to her blonde friend. Her brain hurts from this information, so much so that she feels a sudden need to lie down, like she’s had just enough alcohol to put her in a sleepy mindset, before the stages of tipsy and giddiness. She either must drink some more, or sleep it off, so she attempts to swallow her worries, for Brianna, for _Blair_ , and try to say the right thing.

“You could try?”

It’s probably not the right thing to say, judging from the drop of hopefulness in Brianna’s eyes, the usually bright brunette irises clouded with something darker, that Aquaria has rarely seen before. It’s a little worrying.

“Does me liking a girl make you uncomfortable, Aqua?”

The question takes Aquaria by complete surprise. She feels a lump in her throat at the thought that Brianna could even think that of her, given the nature of what went wrong between them those three and a bit years ago. It’s not the fact that she likes girls that’s bothering Aquaria. It’s just the girl in particular that she likes, it’s just the fact that she’s shit at advice, that she has no idea how to respond to a statement as huge as this one.

“I’m sorry,” says Brianna timidly, when she gets no response from her stunned friend. “I shouldn’t have-”

“Bri, I’m gay,” Aquaria interrupts suddenly, before a flush of embarrassment washes over her.

She doesn’t even mean to say it. She’s not sure why she does. She hadn’t even been aware of her own sexuality, always just pushing it from her mind in favour of matters that she deems more pressing. But, as she says it, she knows the unavoidable truth behind her statement. She’s never had a singular interest in boys, other than as friends, always staring too hard at girls and letting them occupy her swirling mass of thoughts. It’s rare she thinks about a boy, unless you count her dog. She just doesn’t care for them.

She finally glances at Brianna, who looks slightly confused, her features contorted into mild surprise, but there’s something else behind that, maybe some sort of familiarity or comfort, something just out of reach.

“I didn’t know,” she says timidly, smiling at Aquaria as though this information told her everything she needed to know, probably to know that she has someone to rely on to help her with the Blair situation.

“Well, now you do.” Aquaria attempts a smile, but it feels forced, somehow, like somebody else is tugging at her lips.

The bell rings, suddenly, but neither girl makes an attempt to move. Aquaria has Chemistry, a subject she actively despises, and probably the only one that she wouldn’t be bothered about failing. She wonders what Brianna has, but she knows that she has already missed two classes at least today, and the likelihood of her moving is slim.

Instead, Brianna picks up her discarded guitar from the floor and strums a little, her small fingers plucking at the strings.

“You weren’t this good last time I heard you,” says Aquaria casually, watching her friend’s fingers as they pluck out a complicated melody, her left hand sliding up and down the clefts of the guitar.

“Well, I’ve had time to practice. I’ve been missing your harmonies,” Brianna replies, her concentration resting on the guitar, her tongue pushes between her teeth slightly as she tries to maintain the rhythm.

Guilt rises to Aquaria’s mouth like bile. She swallows it quickly, trying to ignore the bitter tone laced through Brianna’s voice – Brianna who, as she recently has learnt, has no idea why their friendship went sour. Aquaria thinks of how she would have felt if Brianna had just started to distance herself from her with no warning or reason, spitting on the name of their friendship and kicking their trust into the dust.

But it’s too late now. It’s been done, and now all she can do is attempt to fix it.

Aquaria watches Brianna play for a little while, following her fingers, entranced by the beauty of the tune, which is melancholic and sorrowful, leaving an ache in Aquaria’s heart despite the lack of words.

She’s thrown from her trance by a sound as though someone is pushing on the door handle. Though Brianna seems not to have noticed, she looks up, seeing the face of a younger girl through the glass of the door, probably a freshman, holding a violin and looking puzzled and a little embarrassed.

Aquaria suddenly realises that Brianna probably isn’t supposed to be in here, and attempts to get her attention by reaching out to grab the girls arm, close to her wrist.

“Bri,” she says softly, as the playing is abruptly stopped and Brianna looks up at her. “Come on, let’s go home. My parents are away so we don’t have to worry about skipping school. We’ll talk, about Blair.”

_Home_. The word hangs in the air as a memory of what used to be, and Brianna seems to pick up on it, because it’s been years since she was last alone with Aquaria in the mansion that she calls her home.

Brianna has a huge family, and they’re very loud, taking up a lot of space in the small house they own a few streets over from Aquaria’s; there always seemed to be something going on, whether it was a screaming friend of one of her siblings over, the birth of one of the never-ending litters of kittens, a brother falling over and cracking his head against the wall, leaving a sizable dent, or anything else that irritated Brianna immensely. Aquaria, meanwhile, is an only child, discounting her dog, Bo, and her parents are often busy or away because of their work, or when they were there they were warm and welcoming, offering cookies and hot chocolate and fizzy drinks that Brianna’s mom would never let her have, could never afford to let her have. Not to mention the huge house is equipped with an outside pool, a luxury that stunned Brianna into silence as an eight-year-old the first time she saw it, and never tired her.

It truly used to be both of their homes, Brianna turning up whenever she wanted like a traveller returning from sea, always heartily welcomed by somebody, even if it was just the dog.

She, of course, has been to Aquaria’s house since that dreadful night which changed everything, but just for the pool parties the girl has become famous for, or joint sleepovers. Never alone, not recently.

But the offer is there now, hanging thick in the air between them as the freshman stays staring through the door, so thick that you could slice through it with a butter knife. Aquaria chews her lip in anticipation as she waits for the reply, hoping this attempt to set their friendship on the road to recreation will be enough.

“Yeah,” agrees Brianna, finally, reaching down to pick up her backpack, before standing up and slinging it across her shoulder. Aquaria follows her lead, watching Brianna carefully, who seems dazed, which worries Aquaria, so she again takes her friend’s wrist and almost has to pull her out the room, muttering a quiet apology to the freshman, who Brianna ignores completely, though whether purposefully or not Aquaria isn’t sure.

They stop by her locker, and she is finally able to dump her stuff, grabbing everything she needs for the weekend, her car keys in one hand and Brianna’s wrist remaining firmly in the other.

The walk through the empty school, assertive in where they’re going, a damp spot on Aquaria’s back from where her hair has dripped down from the water of the shower which Brianna stares at as she is lead out to the parking lot, wondering if she’s been dancing again, and if so, why.

The ride back to Aquaria’s is quiet, with Aquaria stealing glances at Brianna as she drives, ever so often, who is staring out the window as though it’s her first day in a foreign country, where she doesn’t speak the language and the culture is drastically different.

Aquaria feels uneasy still. Brianna’s behaviour remains unusual, and she wonders if it is because of Blair that she’s acting strange, or if there’s something more to it. Either way, Aquaria decides that being there for her is the best thing to do, even if it’s going to be difficult. Even if it will take some getting used to.

It’s April, and a sunny day, so the weather is warm enough to go outside. Aquaria is slightly relieved that Bo is at a doggy daycare, because Brianna looks like she could topple over from just a gentle nudge. The girls stop in the kitchen, dumping their bags and the guitar, and Brianna is able to follow, as though instinctively, the path that leads her out through the sliding door into the backyard, sitting herself on a sun lounger as Aquaria grabs them each a can of soda, a Diet Coke for her and a Sprite for Brianna, plus two straws, before joining her friend outside.

There’s so much to say that there’s nowhere to start, so they each sip, the silence deafening and an awkwardness enclosing them. The sun seems to be mocking the girls as it beats down on them, not quite aggressively but effective all the same. Aquaria pulls her damp black hair from its bun in an attempt to let it dry off a little.

“I’ve really missed you,” says Brianna at last, her timid voice cutting through the silence and startling Aquaria, who had been desperately searching for something to say herself. “Like, I know we’re still friends, but I just. I miss you. You know?”

She does. _Painfully_ well.

“I’m sorry. I know it’s too late to say that now, but, I really am,” Aquaria mumbles, and Brianna seems to understand because she offers her friend a small smile, which reaches her eyes and tugs at Aquaria’s heart.

The silence closes in again, but it feels like they’re at least on the same page now, so it’s not quite as loud.

“So, you said you’d help me? With Blair?” Brianna’s voice cuts through the silence.

Blair. Of course. The subject of Brianna’s grief this last week. Aquaria’s best friend. Probably wondering where she is right now.

“She’s really been troubling you this much? I’ve never seen you slack so much in school.”

It’s an attempt at a joke, but it falls a little flat. The girls aren’t comfortable enough, not yet, to be joking. Not about this.

“Well, yeah, Blair, but just the issue of my sexuality, in general. It’s been messing with my head, a lot. I didn’t know who to talk to. Who would understand.”

That stings a little, because of course Aquaria would understand. Her own sexuality has been something she’s tried to come to grips with herself, for years now. Brianna would know that. If she hadn’t cut ties with her.

“I’m here now,” Aquaria says, and she means it. She wonders slightly why Brianna couldn’t turn to Monét, her usual source of comfort, or Asia, always willing to lend an ear to their griefs. But she doesn’t want to bring it up, not now. “So I guess you have a crush on my best friend, huh?”

Brianna blushes, a deep pink that Aquaria remembers from the days when her body started to go through changes and she was embarrassed to change in front of her, from when she had her first kiss and Aquaria spent a whole day trying to get her to tell her who it was with, from when people would make fun of her heavily populated family and lack of money and she would get flustered and angry, from when she received praise for her winning eighth grade science project. The blush is familiar to Aquaria, and it makes her smile.

“Yeah, I guess I just started noticing, I don’t know, the way she smiles and laughs. How her hair falls. Her dimples. I don’t know, all that shit.”

Aquaria stays silent. She sips her Coke, feeling uncomfortable all of a sudden, searching for something to say in the swirling thoughts of her brain.

“Blair’s the most understanding and sweetest person ever. Just tell her how you feel. If she doesn’t feel the same, she’ll tell you straight up and won’t make it weird,” Aquaria says honestly, knowing Blair probably doesn’t feel the same way, and, even if she did, she would never do anything, not with Brianna, because she knows how Aquaria feels about her, if minuscule, and she’s well aware of their history. There, the order will be restored.

But, Brianna is pouting as she sips through her straw, her brows furrowed as she clearly thinks through what Aquaria has said.

“No,” she says finally, taking Aquaria by surprise.

“No?”

“I’m too much of a coward. Let’s do a scheme.”

_A scheme_. It’s been a hell of a long time since they did a scheme. They used to be pretty basic, but normally it was them trying to stay all alone in Aquaria’s house when her parents went away – either she told them she was staying at Brianna’s, who told her mom she was staying at Aquaria’s (which her mom never minded, she loved having one less mouth to feed), or, more difficult, Aquaria would have to ring up the hired babysitter and, pretending to be her mom, cancel them, and then they would spend the money on junk food. Aquaria’s personal favourite scheme was when they attempted to sneak one of Brianna’s kittens into her house to be her pet. It lasted all of a week, before her dad found out and went mental, but it had been so much fun.

 A wave of nostalgia washes over Aquaria, who grins, wiggling her eyebrows. “What did you have in mind?”

They spend the rest of the day together, and it’s just like old times. Mainly, they lounge by the pool, reminiscing on the old adventures they used to share, whilst half-heartedly attempting to formulate a plan to have Blair fall madly in love with Brianna, though it doesn’t seem to be the first thing on either girls' minds. It takes all of two seconds, and consists of a plan to throw a party at Aquaria’s tomorrow whilst her parents are still away, that being the sole detail.

You can see the sunset from Aquaria’s backyard. The house stands just far enough away from any others, and there’s a small hill in the distance that you can watch the daylight escape under, like a blanket of comfort, settling in for the night before another big day tomorrow. Aquaria often likes to watch it from her bedroom window, or, if she can be bothered she comes and sits outside, where the view is much better. It used to be the subject of many of her paintings and sketches as a kid, and she’s trying desperately to think of a way to include it in her portfolio, a chance to show who she is and where she’s from.

It’s beautiful tonight, the sky full of pink and orange hues, laced with light purples and soft reds. The girls watch in silence, each hypnotised by the beauty of the setting sun. Aquaria snaps a photo on her phone, knowing she’ll long to use the beauty of the colour scheme. It almost inspires her to want to draw; something about being with her old friend in a position they’ve been in many times, watching the beauty of the sunset makes her miss drawing and sketching for pleasure instead of having to work towards something, be it for her various art classes in school, or her ever-looming portfolio.

She glances across at Brianna, whose features are softened by the glow of the disappearing sun, her brown eyes tinted with light. Aquaria wants to draw her too, so she discreetly snaps a picture while the blonde is distracted, making the sure the shutter noise from her camera doesn’t go off, marvelling at the way the light has picked up on the wisps of her curls as they fall down her face and back, the pink in her cheeks and the warmth of her smile. Of course Aquaria can recognise beauty, she knows that all her friends are stunning, and she’s an artist after all, but there’s something about the way that Brianna’s face is illuminated that has Aquaria staring at her, for longer than she needs to. She would make a beautiful painting.

They order pizza, and eat it whilst watching Mean Girls, an old favourite of theirs. Blair of course enjoys the film, but she doesn’t laugh the way that Brianna does, or make jokes and comments at every given moment. They’re the same jokes that she always used to tell, but Aquaria still laughs like it’s the first time she’s heard them because, well, it may as well be.

When the movie ends, Brianna says that it’s getting late and she better get back to the madhouse, to gather her thoughts, and a drop dead gorgeous outfit for the party tomorrow. It’s bittersweet, because Aquaria would love nothing more than to have her stay the night, but she knows they can’t dive into the deep end with the way their friendship used to be straight away, it’s better to start in the shallow end, with a rubber ring, and work your way up. A lot of damage was done, but nothing that isn’t fixable.

Aquaria does offer, however, to paint Brianna’s face before the party tomorrow, promising to have her look good enough to eat. Brianna was always her guinea pig when she first started getting into makeup; there have been many a harsh, unblended smoky eye, smeared bright lipstick and thick slug eyebrows worn by the girl, but Aquaria likes to think you can’t start off a genius in anything, and, thanks to Brianna, her skills in makeup are a whole lot better now.

Brianna smiles warmly, says she’ll think about it, and hugs Aquaria before she leaves.

Aquaria takes it as a win, and goes upstairs to send a message to as many people as possible advertising the last minute party, before digging out a canvas and some old watercolours that aren’t too crusted over, and begins to paint.


	3. Part Three - ... do you declare?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The part ensues, and Aquaria is confused by Brianna's behaviour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, sorry I'm so shit at uploading! I made a playlist for this fic for literally no reason, but it's just a load of really depressing songs and More by 5sos which doesn't fit at all but that was where I got the title from so I thought why not include it? Anway ----

Aquaria is a loyal person. She prides herself on it, even. If someone asks her a good quality about herself, she would probably say the fact that she’s loyal, and dependable. Someone you can rely on. Which is why, on Saturday afternoon, her fingers are hovering over the keyboard on her phone, her messages open to her chat with Blair, trying to decide what to do.

On the one hand, loyalty to her best friend, a girl who has stuck beside her since they met, who is the sweetest and gentlest person ever, who she has always told everything to, would prevail that she texts her and tells her exactly what is going. On the other hand, loyalty to Brianna, a girl who she used to be so close, who she’s trying to build her friendship back up with, who is relying on her help, would prevail that she keeps her mouth shut and instead just tries her best to get them together.

It’s been fucking with her head since Brianna left yesterday, weighing heavily on her mind as she tries to set up for the party. Since it was such late notice, she was hoping that not many people would come, but, her pool parties remain legendary and it seems as though lots of people are buzzing about it. It’s probably the last thing she can be bothered to do, normally she loves hosting, the process of setting everything up and making her house look stunning, with a look that could kill and a legendary soundtrack, but today she really isn’t feeling it.

After finishing a painting of the sunset last night surprisingly quickly, Aquaria had felt inspiration and motivation coursing through her veins for the first time in what felt like forever. She hovered over the picture she had taken of Brianna, but forced herself to close it, instead sketching a design that she knows for sure will make it to her portfolio. Going to bed, and finally drifting off to sleep as dawn started to break back out, her mind was buzzing with excitement, feeling as though she’d found her muse at last in the form of the sky. Now, all she wants to do is go material shopping and focus all of her energy on this look, not get wasted with a bunch of her peers.

But, maybe it’s what she needs right now, after all, her mind has been constantly stressing over her portfolio for what feels like forever now. Drinks, friends, and not to mention busying herself with being Brianna’s wingman for the night with Blair will hopefully take her mind off all the stress.

It makes her feel so guilty that she’s not mentioned at all to Blair what went on yesterday. She called her after Brianna left, telling her that she’d come round and their friendship was starting to be repaired. Blair has been so excited for her, making jokes about how it would progress and they would fall in love, and Aquaria had felt sick, knowing that it was her that was the subject of Brianna’s affections. She wanted nothing more than to tell her, but the thought of Brianna, tortured in her realisation of her feelings, let alone her sexuality, trusting Aquaria with the information and relying on her help, had stopped her.

She finishes getting everything ready by four. The party is due to start at about seven, and Brianna will be over any minute.

It’s making Aquaria a little nervous, and she’s not sure why. She’s worried her hands will shake as she attempts to apply the makeup to her face, worried her breath will be too heavy on her cheeks, worried she won’t be able to look Brianna in the eye.

Brianna shows up at half four, wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, and carrying a bag stuffed with clothes, or options to what will make her look the fittest, as she puts it, a big grin splitting her face in two.

Her hair is done, falling in soft waves that cascade over her shoulders, but her face is makeup free, ready for Aquaria to paint, and she can see a hint of some freckles lightly dusting her cheeks from where the sun has hit them in the warm spring weather.

She’s excited, practically buzzing with energy as she skips up the stairs to where she knows Aquaria’s room is, dumping her bag on the floor and hopping up onto her bed, where she’s sat a million times, her short legs swinging back and forth, unable to reach the floor.

“Ooh, you’re painting again!” Brianna exclaims after looking around and spotting the painting from last night propped up by the window. Aquaria, over at her desk and gathering the makeup she’ll need, blushes.

“It’s nothing good,” she mumbles, but Brianna isn’t listening, she’s already gone over to admire the painting, looking closely at the blend of colours and the soft flicks created by the careful stroke of Aquaria’s paintbrush.

“You talented bitch! Are you sure you want to go into fashion? I swear, this could be hung in the MOMA,” Brianna marvels. Aquaria’s heart falls through the floor.

“Stop, shut up,” she says. She’s never been any good at all at taking compliments. Critiques, yes, but as soon as someone tells her a good thing about herself, she completely freezes and goes stiff. “It was just a quick thing.”

Brianna turns to beam at Aquaria, whose arms are laden with products and brushes.

“It’s beautiful, accept it. Now make  _me_  beautiful!” she says, clapping the palms of her hands together.

Aquaria wants to tell her she’s already beautiful, but she bites her tongue, instead laying out all her products across her bed where Brianna jumps up to sit again, and pulls up her desk chair to face her.

“Now,” Aquaria says, deciding to go full-on makeup artist mode. “It is a pool party, but are you planning on swimming? If so, I’ll do a natural and fresh-faced waterproof look, otherwise, we can make you look more glam.”

Brianna giggles at Aquaria’s suddenly serious demeanour, clearly excited to get her makeup done.

“Well,” she says, faking intensely pondering, like it’s the hardest decision on earth. “I do feel like it’s too cold for the pool, but who knows what drunk me will do. You know if one person jumps in I’ll probably jump in straight after.”

“Ah, alright. We’ll do a gorgeous glowy look, I will challenge Blair to keep her hands off of you!” Aquaria exclaims, slightly awkwardly, her voice dropping a little at the end of her sentence. She curses herself for it, but Brianna doesn’t seem to notice, a smile still etched on her face as she claps the palms of her hands together excitedly.

They’ve not been this close in so long. Not since the night that ended it all, and now, everything is different. It almost feels weird to lean across Brianna as Aquaria starts to the process, her hand so close to her thigh on the bed, their boobs almost grazing each other at the proximity. Brianna blinks softly as Aquaria’s breath fans across her face, her lips parted in concentration as she starts to rub primer into her flushed cheeks.

Brianna’s face feels warm under Aquaria’s fingers. She’s trying to be as gentle as possible, but she’s worried she’s hurting her as her face is flushed under her touch.

“Am I hurting you?” she asks, breaking the silence, her delicate fingers still moving in slow circles across Brianna’s skin, moving to her chin and across her nose.

“N-no,” Brianna stutters, before clearing her throat awkwardly. Her eyes flicker up to meet Aquaria’s. They look so clear that Aquaria is almost surprised she can’t see her reflection in them. Her brown irises are flickered with flecks of gold and Aquaria almost has to tear her own eyes away as she reaches for her foundation.

“This is my favourite,” she says, trying to pull back into beauty guru mode, but her voice holds a softer register than before. “It won’t go  _anywhere_.”

She dots the foundation all over Brianna’s face, before starting to softly dab with her sponge. This part always used to make Brianna giggle, her ticklish nature coming through, especially as Aquaria focused on her neck. She’s giggling now, obviously trying to suppress it but her eyes crinkle and her body shakes slightly as she tries to hold in the laughter. It’s infectious, and Aquaria finds herself grinning as Brianna’s head bobs back and forth, trying to pretend she’s not ticklish.

“Hold still!” she laughs, using her free hand to gently take hold of Brianna’s chin. Her laughter immediately ceases, and she tenses slightly under the touch, her lips parting as she takes a sharp intake of breath. 

Aquaria takes a long time to blend out the foundation. Her thumb subconsciously strokes against Brianna’s jawline, and Brianna’s tongue subconsciously flickers out across her lower lip, her warm brown eyes blinking slowly. 

Finally, the foundation cannot possibly be blended anymore, so Aquaria drops her hand from Brianna’s chin, and continues the makeup process slowly.

The atmosphere has definitely shifted. Neither girl is speaking as Aquaria continues with the makeup, her skilled hands working at Brianna’s face as the blonde sits chewing the inside of her cheek. Aquaria wants to tell her to stop it, because it’s annoying as hell when you’re trying to apply makeup to said cheek, but something stops her. Brianna seems nervous, and there’s a lump in her throat. It’s probably about Blair, so Aquaria bites her tongue, metaphorically but also literally as she concentrates on her work. 

She tries to concentrate on how much she loves makeup and how happy she to have someone to practise on again. Blair lacks the patience for her experiments, always fidgeting and getting bored, hating the whole process, but Brianna was always the perfect model, and her biggest hypeman at the end, saying she was obsessed with the look, even if it took 6 hours and looked like shit. Which was common. 

Finally, all that’s left is lipstick. Aquaria dithers, knowing Brianna is perfectly capable of putting it on herself, and it’s inappropriate to touch her lips, probably. But for some reason, she wants to. It’s just so the look will be perfect, of course. The application will be smooth, and Blair will find her irresistible. 

She gently takes hold of Brianna’s chin again to steady her face. Brianna, who wasn’t paying attention, jumps ever so slightly at the sudden contact, staring at Aquaria with her big, brown eyes widened.

“Can you open like this for me,” says Aquaria softly, demonstrating with her own mouth slightly agape. She obliges, silently, blinking softly, which Aquaria tries to ignore, instead focusing on Brianna’s lips as she swipes her lipstick across her open bottom lip. Brianna’s lips are plumper than her own, and pinker, and they pick up pigment with less ease, so she has to work a little harder on her lips, taking her time to make sure the lipstick looks perfect, because, obviously, you want it to stay on.

“Eyes closed,” instructs Aquaria, and Brianna’s eyes immediately droop shut on the command. She sprays her setting spray on her friend’s face, before leaning back to admire her work.

She looks good. Really good. Aquaria went for a soft pink eye look, with bronzy and glowing cheeks, and a lipstick that is remarkably close to Brianna’s natural colour. It suits her really well, so Aquaria’s eyes linger on Brianna’s lips, out of jealousy, of course.

_I want to kiss her._

Oh  _god_ , where did that come from? Of course she doesn’t want to kiss her, that’s ridiculous. It’s just because of the close proximity of the last hour, and the focus on her lips. That’s all.

“Um, okay,” says Aquaria, causing Brianna’s eyes to flutter open. Aquaria pushes herself back, quickly, getting up from her chair and turning away from Brianna, who shifts on her bed, reaching for her handheld mirror lying near her.

She needs to get drunk, that’s all. Tequila is the answer to this insanity, to her racing mind. Her stupid, dumb thoughts of her friend.

“Ooh, I look so good!” exclaims Brianna, admiring her own face from several different angles, getting a close look at her eyes and cheeks.

“Yeah, you look beautiful. Good luck to Blair if she wants to keep her hands off you.”

 _Why did she say that?_  That’s a weird fucking thing to say. It makes her sound like she wants  _her_  hands on Brianna, and she doesn’t, not one bit. Nor Brianna’s hands on her, for that matter. Nor her lips. Not at all.

 But she hears Brianna giggle, and turns as she jumps down from the bed, taking a short step and wrapping her in a hug, her short arms around Aquaria’s waist, and her head pressed against her shoulder. Aquaria’s arms wrap around her instinctively, giving the shorter girl a small squeeze.

“Thanks, Aqua,” Brianna mumbles into her shoulder, before pulling away just as quickly and giving her a beaming smile. “Now I need to get dressed!”

Aquaria laughs. She’s already decided what she wants to wear, and she’s going to be doing a full glam look on herself, because there is absolutely no way in hell she’s going in the pool. Even drunk-her wouldn’t do that. She hopes.

They put an old playlist on that they used to listen to all the time as prepubescent tweens, chock-a-block with old classics, from Cher to Prince to One Direction to Disney and back again, which has both girls shamelessly screaming along to the music as they each get ready. Well, Brianna is ready pretty quickly, opting for a metallic gold bikini with a sheer, tight white dress over it thanks to Aquaria’s suggestion, and is dancingaroundd the bedroom like a crazy person as Aquaria attempts to focus on her makeup, busy laughing and singing.

Finally, she’s finished, and she goes to the bathroom to put on a totally impractical high legged, low cut black leather swimsuit, with some shorts that are  _so_  short they can barely be classified as clothing. There’s no way she’s changing in front of Brianna, they’re not that comfortable with each other yet, and the other girl had clearly felt the same, because she didn’t even notice that she’d gone as she concentrated on her eyebrows. By the time she looked up, the blonde was back to dancing, this time in her outfit.

“Let’s get drunk!” Aquaria yells as she comes ou oft the bathroom, Brianna cheering wildly. They head downstairs, each wearing wedges. It’s just after seven, so Aquaria turns on her playlist for the night, at a lower volume to start with, as Brianna sloppily pours out to glasses of tequila, probably spilling more than she pours.

“To the first pool party of the season!” she yells, handing Aquaria a glass.

“To loving women!” Aquaria yells back. They chink their glasses together, yet more tequila spilling over the sides, and down the shots, both grimacing and coughing slightly. It’s been a hot minute since Aquaria had some alcohol, and by that she means a month, and she grins wildly at the familiar burning sensation in her throat.

Aquaria’s pouring out the next shot, wasting far less, when the doorbell rings, and the tell-tale laugh of Monét is heard over the music, piercing the air.

“Paaaaart-ay!” yells Brianna, throwing her arms in the air and screaming.

It’s half eight, and Aquaria is wasted already. Not completely, but she’s getting there. People keep handing her shots, and she keeps taking and downing them, not caring what’s in them.

Most people are outside; the evening is pleasantly warm, and several people are messing around in the pool, which is definitely going to have to be cleaned before her parents get home.

She hasn’t seen Brianna for a while. She’s in the living room, dancing in a group with Vixen, Asia and Blair, so she has no idea where she could be, but it’s not the first thing on her mind as she has her arm around Blair’s shoulders, screaming along to the music and shaking all she has.

Her mind is totally not on Brianna, but she can’t help but think about how she’s not spoken to Blair all night. And Blair is tipsy right now, most people are outside and Aquaria is there to tell her to egg her on, it would be the perfect opportunity to speak to her. But, there’s no sign of Brianna. Not that she’s even thinking about it.

The upbeat song ends and is replaced by something with a more laidback tone. Asia splits off from the group, exclaiming how she’s gasping for vodka, and Aquaria can’t help but marvel at how good an idea that is, trotting behind her to the kitchen.

“So, you have your eyes on anyone?” Asia yells over the music, gesturing to everybody outside as she tops her vodka up with lemonade. She doesn’t seem drunk, but Asia never normally is one to get wasted, always looking out for her friends instead, and Aquaria grabs the bottle of vodka, swaying slightly as she takes a long gulp straight from the bottle.

“I’m wingwomanning,” she slurs, struggling through the big word and hiccupping. Asia laughs at her, grabbing her shoulders to steady her friend and forcing the bottle out of her hands, placing it on the counter out of reach.

“To who?” she asks.

“Briiiiianna,” Aquaria draws out her name, laughing at herself. “She’s got a  _crush_.”

Asia’s face contorts in surprise, for a reason unknown to Aquaria. Not that she cares at that given moment, her mind fogged with alcohol.

“Well, where is she now?”

“Mm, good question,” Aquaria comments, looking around her kitchen as though it’s not just them in there. “Oh, probably my room!”

“Go find her then, dumbass!” Asia laughs, pushing Aquaria gently, causing her to sway a little again.

“Ooh, girl. I’m going, I’m going!” Aquaria laughs, turning and practically running out the kitchen.

She walks back through her living room, feeling pleased with herself, and happy that she can see Brianna again, so she can help her, of course. Blair and Vixen are still dancing together. Their bodies are kind of close together, and Blair’s head is thrown back in laughter, Vixen grinning from ear to ear.

Aquaria waves at them, even though they’re not looking and don’t see her and she looks like an idiot, and starts searching her house for Brianna.

She probably looks in the same three rooms about eight times, but to Aquaria it feels like she’s searching in a mansion with a million bedrooms and bathrooms. Eventually, she crashes open the door to the spare room after what feels like forever, and there she is, Brianna, sat facing away from her on the bed, her shoulders slumped slightly.

“Bri!” Aquaria yells happily, unable to read the tone of the room as Brianna turns to face her, a small smile breaking her face.

“Hi, Aqua,” she says sadly, and Aquaria takes this as her cue to make her way over to the bed and sits, basically on top of Brianna, wrapping her arms around her neck and squeezing her in an aggressive, drunk attempt at a hug.

Brianna has instinctively wrapped her arm around Aquaria’s waist, trying to steady her friend who is rocking back and forth, her cheek pressed against hers.

“I don’t get you at all,” Brianna shakes her head. Aquaria is sober enough to realise she isn’t drunk at all, the drink in her left hand is almost full and she doesn’t remember her taking part in any shots, except the first two with her. But she’s drunk enough not to remember how happy and excited Brianna had been for the party, how ready she was to get drunk. Aquaria stops rocking like a lunatic and drops her hands from Brianna’s neck, though her left leg is still over the top of Brianna’s right one, her foot bouncing up and down, her hands resting on Brianna’s thigh.

“Why, what did I do?” Aquaria pouts, upset at how upset Brianna is. The blonde sighs, pushing Aquaria off of her a little as she scoots away from her touch. Aquaria’s hands fall to rest in her lap, her head dropping in disappointment, missing the lack of contact.

“Don’t you even know how much you hurt me? I don’t even know what I did, for god’s sake, and suddenly you drop me like I’m nothing, like I meant nothing to you for six fucking years! And we couldn’t just be enemies, we had to stay friends through high school! You know how hard it was to be sitting across from you at lunch, watching you laugh with your new best friend, inviting her to your house, whilst I had to sit there, wondering what the fuck I did? And now, we’re best fucking friends again, you’re doing my makeup and telling me I’m beautiful like the last three and half years didn’t even happen! What the  _fuck_ , Aquaria?”

Aquaria blinks, trying to take in what Brianna says as she blurts it all out at once. She’s angry as hell, and maybe taking advantage of the fact that Aquaria possibly won’t remember this in the morning. She’s not sure she wants to. Her head is spinning, and she wants to throw up all of a sudden. She is aware of the tears in Brianna’s eyes, and wants to cry herself, but she swallows heavily instead.

“You don’t remember what happened. You were drunk,” she whispers, so quietly she doesn’t even think Brianna heard it at first, but the blonde is looking at her, and a tear slips down her cheek. Aquaria reaches up to her face and brushes it away, and Brianna lets her.

“Tell me,” the blonde whispers, almost desperately, all the anger faded into sadness.

“I kissed you,” Aquaria says, for the first time, because there’s no filter on her mouth. “And you hated it. You slapped me and you ran away and I was humiliated.”

Brianna says nothing. She looks shocked, and confused, and Aquaria plays with her fingers, her drunk mind not comprehending the magnitude of what she’s just revealed, already moving on to the next thing. 

“Why haven’t you spoken to Blair?” she asks. “That was what this whole night was for. She’s with Vixen downstairs, you should-”

“Aquaria, shut up. Please.”

Aquaria shuts up, unsure of what she’s done to upset her friend. She thought she understood Brianna, but she’s starting to think that she couldn’t have been more wrong, as the blonde takes a long gulp of her drink, and looks Aquaria dead in the eye, who cowers under her gaze.

“Why couldn’t you have just fucking said something, Aquaria? Anything! I’ve had to wonder for almost four fucking years about what the hell I did to you to make you hate me so much,” Brianna doesn’t seem angry at all, but the hurt in her voice makes Aquaria’s heart ache. She plays with her fingers in her lap, unable to look her in the eye.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know you didn’t know. I thought you hated me,” mumbles Aquaria, though she knows it’s a weak excuse. 

“It wasn’t me who ruined our friendship. You pushed me away, you ignored my calls, you stopped speaking to me altogether. You broke my fucking heart, not the other way around.”

“Well why do you think I pushed you away?” Aquaria demands, and the filter on her mouth would typically stop her from saying what she is about to. “I kissed you and you slapped me! I was heartbroken.”

Something registers across Brianna’s face, but Aquaria isn’t looking up to see it, and Brianna stands up, downing the rest of her drink, catching her attention.

“I want to be drunk. Right now,” she says, and Aquaria just nods, watching Brianna start to walk towards the door again. “You coming?”

Aquaria doesn’t want to. She wants to throw up, she wants to down a gallon of water. She wants everyone to go home. But she smiles, and gets up anyway, reaching out to take Brianna’s outstretched hand, and is lead back down to the party.

As Brianna starts to get drunker, Aquaria starts to sober. 

She throws up, as she thought she would, in the downstairs bathroom, and from then switches to water, watching as the rest of the party get more and more wasted, sulking in the corner like a toddler who hasn’t gotten her way as her mind plays her argument with Brianna over and over again.

Almost everybody is outside now, the pool filled with drunken teenagers, and the only people she can tell that aren’t black-out drunk are Asia, who is trying to stop Monét from completely stripping to skinny dip, and Blair, who is sipping her drink in the corner out the way as she watches the shitshow around her. She catches Aquaria’s eye and waves, immediately coming over.

“Hey, why do you not look drunk anymore?” she asks, wrapping her hand around Aquaria’s arm and giving it a small squeeze. “What’s up, boo?”

“I had a sobering experience with Brianna,” Aquaria sighs, giving her best friend a look that says it all. Blair pulls a face of sympathy, not needing to ask any questions.

It’s as though Brianna was waiting for Blair to approach Aquaria, because suddenly she’s there, on the other side of Blair, looking totally out of it. Aquaria’s notes proudly that her makeup still looks flawless, despite a slight smudging of her lipstick, though now is hardly the time.

“Heeey, sexy ladies!” Brianna’s drawls, bursting into laughter, though it’s hardly funny. She grabs Blair’s thin arm, digging in her nails and pulling it slightly, which makes Blair wince. Aquaria wants to slap her stupid, drunk face.

“Aqua, can I borrow Blair? We need to chat,” she hiccups. Blair shoots Aquaria a look of confusion and concern, and Aquaria feels physically sick, and this time it’s not a result of the alcohol. This is not how this night was supposed to go, at all. Brianna has had all night to make her move, to dance with Blair, to chat to Blair, to do whatever the hell she wanted to do. And she has to choose  _now_ , to drag Aquaria’s best friend off to god knows where, right now that Aquaria needs her.

“Sure,” Aquaria says curtly, turning away as Brianna laughs and starts to drag a bewildered Blair away.

 _What the hell is this night?_  Aquaria thinks to herself as she stares absentmindedly at Kameron making out with some guy in their year in her pool. She just wants to curl up in a ball and go to sleep. She regrets her outfit too. It’s starting to get cold, and she doesn’t have the buzz of alcohol to keep her warm. It sucks.

It really fucking sucks.

She takes one last look at the party, and turns to go back inside, walking slowly up the stairs to her bedroom.

Aquaria takes her time taking off her makeup, thoroughly cleansing her face as she feels tiredness wash over her. Her mind won’t shut off, won’t stop thinking about the stupid night, and she’s stuck on her hand’s rubbing moisturiser into Brianna’s face, dancing like an idiot with her to stupid, old songs, squeezing her tightly, not the way she spat out words poisoned with anger and years of hurt.

Aquaria knows that pushing her away was wrong, she knew it then and she knows it now, she doesn’t need Brianna to remind her of that. But she stands by it. Being rejected hurt too bad.

She crawls into her bed, listening to the thumping of the music below, and turns to face the wall, her mind racing with thoughts of the blonde, good and bad.

She’s infuriating, and she’s driving Aquaria crazy. She’s lost and confused, wondering what the hell Brianna is doing right now with Blair, if she’s managed to make her move. Maybe they’re making out right now.

But something about it feels strange to Aquaria. Brianna’s behaviour the whole night has been contrasting and weird. She hopes to god that their argument hasn’t impeded their friendship, not now that it’s seemingly on the road to recovery.

Aquaria lies awake for hours, her mind whirring at a million miles a minute.

If it hadn’t been so preoccupied and busy, perhaps she would have noticed a small figure open and close her bedroom door, before crawling into bed beside her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to leave a comment below, I would love to hear your feedback! See you soon!


	4. Part Four - Chelsea Bun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clean-up on aisle ten. Aquaria's heart is torn, and she meets someone to piece it back together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, I had immense trouble with this chapter for some reason and I don't really like it, so I hope the fact that it's almost 5500 words makes up for that.  
> Basically, you can thank @bertie-bees for most of this, I'm sure you all know who she is, but basically she literally fed me most of the ideas for this chapter (and listened to my shitty ramblings) as well as actually physically writing that paragraph about the painting, which will probably be the best paragraph in this whole shitty fic, which I merely edited to suit my writing more, because I fucking suck at art, just you know, in general.  
> Anyway, I'm introducing an original character in this chapter, I kinda don't hope you hate her, but also kinda hope you do, I don't know? She's a plot point, but she's still my baby. She's the second role in the roles, if you recall. Who knows how long she'll be around for? Not me, because I don't plan things.  
> Also, don't hate Bri and Blair. They're being stupid, but we can forgive them, because they have reason, even if they are being misguided and dumb. Love their dumb asses.  
> Also, remember that we only ever get Aquaria's perspective, and she tends to be dramatic. Just, you know, bare that in mind as you read.  
> Make sure to leave your comments and critiques down below so I can continue to feed my ego. See you in, I dunno, however long it takes for me to finish the next one? I'm trying, guys. I am.

Aquaria wakes up the next morning feeling groggy and weird. She doesn't remember actually drifting off, and her head feels like it's being repeatedly pounded against the wall.

She groans and turns over, nearly jumping out her skin when she sees Blair curled into a ball, sleeping peacefully beside her in her huge bed, her makeup smudged across her face and Aquaria's pillow.

Aquaria is confused. Did Brianna make a move, or not? And if she did, why is Blair in her bed, and not Brianna's? And if not, _why the hell not_?

She just doesn't get it. Brianna had wanted this party as a chance to seduce Blair, but she had done nothing at all, and Aquaria is baffled as to why. She gets that it's scary and nerve wracking to have a crush on your friend, let alone confront them, but it almost feels like the opposite. Like Brianna doesn't care at all.

It makes Aquaria kind of angry, though she had no reason to be. It's not really her business, but she was dragged into it, and she really doesn't want her best friend to be hurt by Brianna, no matter her intentions.

Eventually, Blair's eyes flutter open, and she squints up at Aquaria, who is sitting up, motionless, staring into space.

"Um, morning Q," chuckles Blair, pushing herself up onto her elbows, rubbing her smudged eyes with the back of her hand.

"Hey. What's up? Didn't wanna go home?" Aquaria teases, though her heart isn't in it, as half of her words are taken up by a loud yawn which stretches her whole face and brings tears glistening her eyes.

"Ugh, it was late. You love me," the brunette rolls her eyes, smiling as she knows it's not only not a problem, but her best friend appreciates her being there.

"Yeah, I do. What happened with Brianna?" Aquaria tries to sound casual, but Blair gives her a look that says she's not achieving it all, which she firmly ignores.

"Literally nothing. We just danced for a bit, and then she disappeared."

Aquaria sighs, resting her head against the headboard, trying desperately to figure out what the hell is going on in Brianna's brain. It's completely confusing, and she's completely over being confused by it; despite it being all of two days, it feels like way longer as she tries to figure out what will happen between her two friends, if anything at all.

If she hadn't been caught up in confusion at this point, she would have noticed Blair biting her stained lip in guilt, clearly in conflict about what she's just said, and perhaps all her confusion would be cleared. But she doesn't.

"Can I ask you something?" Blair continues, and Aquaria just nods, still not looking at her. "Does she like me?"

Oh fuck. It's one thing to not tell your best friend something, but it's another to totally lie to their face, so Aquaria nods slowly, finally glancing across at Blair. She slides down from her seated position, lying down to face Blair, who is prompted to do the same, their faces resting on their respective pillows as a sense of intimacy is created between them.

"Yeah," she says simply, giving in to the defeat, blinking slowly at Blair who lets out a long sigh, and pulls a face that says she knew that already.

"And how do you feel? I know I joke about it, but do you genuinely like her?" the brunette asks, as usual her focus not on herself and her own love life, but the thoughts and feelings of somebody else, which Aquaria reluctantly gives in to, knowing Blair would never even look at Brianna if she thought that her best friend had feelings for her.

"No, B. I don't. I just feel like we could finally be friends again, and anyway, I was helping her. With you," she admits, seeing the words process in Blair's brain as she thinks over what Aquaria has said.

"She's not really done much," she says finally, of course not meaning it maliciously, just stating a fact, plain and simple.

"I think she's scared. But who the fuck knows?" Aquaria rolls her eyes, and Blair grins, pressing her face into the pillow. "What are you gonna do?"

"You're sure you don't like her at all?" the brunette mumbles, blinking at Aquaria as though she expects a different answer than the one she's been given already, but Aquaria will be damned if she's going to give it to her, so she just rolls her eyes again, sweeping away a stray piece of hair that's fallen into her pale blue irises.

"She's repulsive," she says, and Blair gives her a pointed look, so, abruptly, she changes the subject to something else that's less related to the familiar blonde. "Do you even like girls?"

"I don't _not_ like girls," Blair says, causing Aquaria to lift her head a little, a huge smile breaking into her face as she looks at her best friend in a new light. "What?"

"We're all turning out to be gay. I love America," she sighs, resting her head back down as Blair turns onto her back, laughing loudly as she stares up at the ceiling, both girls laughing to themselves.

"Well, if you can't question your sexuality in high school, when can you?" Blair ponders.

"Uh, college?" her friend replies, and she snorts.

"Well, yeah. _Are_ you? I know we've never talked about it, like, are you questioning yourself or do you know?" Blair asks timidly, unsure if she's crossing a line, as she looks at Aquaria, who seems unbothered by the question, picking at where her fake nail has started to peel off.

"Oh, I'm maybe 98% sure I'm a lesbian?" she says. She's decided to give up worrying about her sexuality â€“ there are bigger things to think about for her, and the statement rings true. Blair nods, as though she was already expecting this answer.

"What percentage are you sure about not liking Brianna?"

Aquaria rolls her eyes, probably for the millionth time this morning, her mothers voice ringing in her ears about how they'll stick there forever.

"Blair."

"I'm just checking! The last thing I want is your feelings to get hurt," the brunette says, and her friend can't help but smile.

"So you're gonna go for it?" Aquaria asks, the loud crack in her voice giving away her attempt to sound aloof and unbothered. Blair looks at her with pity, but nods her head slowly.

"Yeah," she says simply. "I'm gonna test the waters, you know?"

"Well, good luck."

They're silent for a little while. Aquaria can't tell for sure what's on Blair's mind, but she for one is thinking about what the hell might happen if her two friends get together, a possibility that's looking more and more like a reality. Obviously, she has nothing against it, and she wants both of them to be happy, she just can't help but feel a little weird about the fact that they're choosing to be happy with each other. She wonders if she'll be left in the dust, forgotten by both of them, left out as they get closer. But it's selfish. She knows Blair would never do that to her.

"You wanna see what the damage is?" Blair asks after a while, talking about the aftermath of the party. Aquaria groans. This is for sure her least favourite part, but she's lucky she always has Blair to help her clean up. It doesn't feel quite so bad that way.

"It'll be mostly outside, right?" she grumbles, and Blair laughs.

"Come on, we've got a couple hours."

Blair practically has to pull Aquaria out of bed, who is clinging onto her covers at a desperate attempt to grasp onto comfort instead of facing the day.

Fortunately, the house isn't that bad. It's not a pretty sight, but Aquaria's definitely seen it a lot worse in her home. She was right, and most of the mess is outside, but there's still some cleaning up to do in the living room, the kitchen, the downstairs bathroom.

She groans at the sight of all the plastic cups, empty bottles and cans, spilt drink and general litter covering her house.

"I'll grab the bin bags!" says Blair cheerily. "We'll save the pool until last."

They get to work, starting inside, Blair filling the bin bags and Aquaria following behind her with the vacuum cleaner, or a mop and bucket where necessary.

They're in the bathroom, sharing the stories on the drunken escapades last night, laughing as they clean, when the doorbell rings.

The girls look at each other in confusion, before panic starts to wash over Aquaria.

"It's my parents!" she exclaims as she leaps up, ripping the gloves off her delicate hands and shoving them at her best friend. "They're back and we're not done and I'm going to die!"

"Oh relax," Blair calls after her, as she runs out the bathroom. "It's probably just a kid who's forgotten their phone, or something."

It's not her parents, but it's not someone looking for their lost items, either.

"Hi," a familiar blonde says timidly after Aquaria practically rips the door off it's hinges, a messy bun piled on her head, in the same t shirt and sweatpants she showed up in yesterday.

"Hey, Bri, what's up?" Aquaria says cautiously. The girl looks nervous; she's fiddling with her fingers, her head bent, and her lip being chewed to pieces as she refuses to look at her friend.

"Is Blair still here? I wanna chat to her."

The request takes Aquaria by surprise a little. She blinks slightly, taking a step back from the force of the words that have just hit her.

What the hell is this girl _doing_? She had all night to talk to Blair, and now she wants do it when Aquaria needs help with cleaning her house before her parents show up and skin her alive for the mess. But, she shakes herself out of the trance as she calls her best friend's name.

She looks Brianna up and down, who is still staring at the ground, as they wait the few seconds for Blair's smiling face to appear.

Brianna has always been short, and although Aquaria used to be smaller, it didn't take long to outgrow her once puberty started for each of them.

She remembers the day Brianna had finally hit 5 feet; she had been so excited, marking it with a little crayon on her kitchen wall and drawing a sparkly pink heart around her name, much to her mother's disapproval. Little did she know, she would only ever grow half an inch more than that, whereas Aquaria would overtake the height by 8 more inches, to Brianna's dismay.

Aquaria has always thought that what Brianna lacked in height she more than made up for in many other aspects; where on her bad days she thinks of herself as a stick - long, slender legs, small chest and ass - Brianna's curvaceous figure is more than plentiful, let alone her personality attributes, such as her large heart and brain. Although she's a lot taller, Brianna has never seemed small to Aquaria.

But right now, she looks tiny. Afraid and confused, cowering in the doorway of a house she used to know so well.

"What's up?" Blair's standing in the doorway next to Aquaria, looking at Brianna, who finally glances up at the girls.

"Can we go somewhere? I really need to talk to you."

She sounds almost desperate. Blair glances at Aquaria, who simply shrugs, and she nods, smiling at the blonde.

"Of course. Um, I'll see you later?" she says, before stepping out onto the porch with Brianna.

Aquaria closes the door behind them, a horribly familiar sense of confusion beginning to settle in her brain.

_What the actual fuck?_

Her confusion turns to anger as she stares at the mess still surrounding her - they had barely made a dent and now she has to clean up all by herself. Thanks to Brianna.

Brianna, who had whisked away her best friend right from under her nose. Again. Why does she keep doing it? It's as though she gets some sort of thrill out of winding Aquaria up, though she never stays long enough to see the aftermath of her hurt feelings.

And Blair? Aquaria scrubs the kitchen floor furiously, the stain from the tiles long gone. How dare she have the nerve to lie in bed, ask her over and over again what her feelings were, and then disregard them and leave her completely alone to clean up from this mess of a party that she didn't even get to enjoy?

She tries not to think about what the pair of them are doing right now, probably making out in the back of Brianna's car, as she ferociously throws all the rubbish in the bin bags, picking up countless discarded items.

She can't help but see red, and she doesn't even know why, and it's not just from how hard her hands are scrubbing. She feels betrayed. A strong, deep sense of betrayal resting unpleasantly in her gut.

But Aquaria has no reason to feel this way. Neither of these girls owe her anything; they're her friends, and they want to be happy with each other. But something about that statement leaves a sour taste in her mouth.

It's only as she's skimming her pool with the net, almost losing her balance as her mind is still occupied by her two best friends, that it hits her so hard she almost falls in.

Aquaria likes Brianna.

Like, a _lot_.

Which makes sense. It makes a whole lot of fucking sense, which makes Aquaria even angrier, for being so stupid and -

It's not even fucking anger she's feeling, it's jealously. Burning in the pit of her stomach just as bright, just as angry. Just as vivid. She's fucking jealous of Blair, not for taking away her friend, but for taking away her affection.

"This is stupid," Aquaria mumbles to herself, busying herself with the rest of the clean-up.

She texts Blair, asking her to fill her in later, and then tries to find something to do, _anything_ , to keep her mind off of fucking Brianna.

She heads to the garage, which is empty and set up for a space for her to dance in. She uses it now, pushing her body to the limit on a slightly hungover, slightly angry, slightly confused brain, willing all thoughts of anything to be gone.

Blair doesn't text her back until almost midnight, just as she's finally about to drift off to sleep. Until then, she spends the day with her parents; they watch a movie, they eat popcorn, they play a dumb game, she receives presents from their trip.

The text is simple. _We talked and hung out. I want to see how far we could go._

A small tear slips down Aquaria's cheek and onto her pillow, and she wipes it away, blaming it on overtiredness. She can't feel like this. She can't. She's going to have to will away this stupid crush.

Deep down, she knows it's more than a crush, but there's no way in hell she's going to admit that - not to herself, not to anyone. She's going to ignore it. And keep moving on with her life, her focus on fashion, and art, and maybe a peppering of actual school. That's it.

Aquaria does her best to avoid the two of them at school the following week. Just because, the wound is a little fresh. She'll get used to it, but she can't face it right now.

She's civil of course - she doesn't want them to know anything is wrong, and when Blair asks her if she's okay, she changes the subject, blaming it totally on her portfolio, and excuse which is way to easy to fall back on.

It's hard to ghost them. Lunchtime on Monday and Tuesday she spends at the gym, Wednesday up at the art block, sketching by herself in an empty classroom. On Thursday, she decides that avoiding everyone is starting to look suspicious, so she builds herself up to it all day, letting herself get more and more worked up at the thought of spending time with them, and they don't even show up.

She questions it, with the rest of the group, but nobody seems to know where they are, which makes her feel a million times worse. She eats her lunch in silence as the girls laugh around her, an invisible, impenetrable wall up around her, not that anybody really seems to notice, or if they do, they don't care.

On Friday, she stays home, pulling a sickie just because she can, and lays in bed all day, watching Netflix and eating junk food, but by Saturday morning, she's going stir crazy. She has to get out, she has to do something.

Aquaria's fingers however over her messages with Blair, which have been sparse this past week, though she knows it's her fault. She sighs, locking her phone, and goes over to her wardrobe, going to the back where everything she has ever designed or made is set out, organised amongst the chaos of all her clothes.

She flicks through her sketchbook, her fingers running absently along the materials of the looks hanging up. She comes to rest on the sunset-inspired look right at the back, and hums to herself, digging her way through all of her material and fabric to try and find something suitable, but nothing looks right with what she had pictured when designing the outfit.

That's what she has to do, then. Go to her favourite fabric store. She decides to walk there, since it's not far from her home, and her mind could use the fresh air, a sense of relief.

She spends a long time there, going up and down every aisle, trying to get lost in all the material, but her mind still can't help but wonder over to Brianna and Blair, and what they're up to right now. If they're together. All the same, she eventually manages to find some material that she believes is perfect for her vision, plus some other bits that she definitely does not need, but she's a sucker for anything with a sparkle.

Aquaria decides to walk the long way home, winding her way through the smaller, artsy streets of New York, unseen by many tourists, that she loves so much.

Looking at the street art and graffiti on the walls gives Aquaria a sense of peace. There's a mural that she comes back to whenever she can to see the progress of the artist; she's never seen them in person, but she adores their work, and their use of colour and texture. It excites her to see what new has been added to the mural, and today though it's merely an abundance of blue paint, swirled in with the purple and red to create a vibrant tone to the piece, she marvels in its beauty anyway.

Aquaria stops off at her favourite little coffee shop, greeting the regular barista happily as she grabs her latte and her usual cake of choice, a Chelsea bun, which happens to be a weakness of hers, and her favourite indulgence. She sits outside to bask in the warmth of the sunlight as she sips her coffee. Aquaria slips her cake into her bag, for later, and heads over to the museum next door. It isn't her favourite, it's very small and not exactly the MOMA, but she loves the uniqueness and the individuality of the pieces. It's a place where you can truly see the soul of the artists presented, where they're not drowned out by a million other pieces of work and people trying to have their say.

She heads inside, paying the $10 entrance fee, unsurprised to see very few people milling around inside; a few older ladies, a mother with a sleeping baby looking as though she's experiencing art for the first time, a few students. There's a new exhibition added, so she makes her way over to it. She sits on a bench, staring at a huge painting by this anonymous artist.

The canvas consists various hues of whites and reds, swirling together into a perfected pink balance. Aquaria attempts to ignore how the simple white strokes of the painting scream Brianna; the innocent perfection of her character, from her schoolwork, to her bubbly demeanour, to her endearingly friendly body language. The innocent perfection that has grasped Aquaria with both hands, making her again and again so infuriatingly tongue-tied and flustered that the chaos of her mind barely ceases to reflect the charming chaos of the painting. Aquaria attempts to ignore how the eye-catching red flourishes seem to demand attention in the same seductive and passionate manner Aquaria has embodied many times when she saunters anywhere, in her too short skirts, demanding all the attention of the room, when she smirks and smiles, when she throws her whole heart and soul into a design, into her dance. The seductive, passionate manner that is only ever for Brianna, yet that Brianna has never cared to indulge in, that she has never cared to notice. Mostly, however, Aquaria tries to ignore how the sickly-sweet flashes of beaming yellow slashes through the marrying pink hues, the same beaming yellow possessed by Blair, that is nurtured, unbeknownst to her, into everything she does. The same beaming yellow that has enticed Brianna, stealing any attention from the red tones that are almost muted next to it, almost comedically placed into the painting, which have no reason to be there. She attempts to ignore it all, the laughing of the cruelly, poorly executed metaphor; it all means nothing.

She takes a gulp from her half cold coffee, staring at the painting in all its bitter glory, the coffee still burning in her throat despite it's lukewarm taste. Aquaria almost doesn't notice another figure place themselves down next to her, until they bump their shoulder with hers, making her jump from her trance as she turns to look at the stranger who has so rudely popped her bubble.

"Hey, sorry, didn't mean to make you jump. You look like you're in fairyland," the stranger says, a grin spreading across her face, accentuating dimples and smile lines and warm hazel eyes.

She's stunning, Aquaria notes in the back of her mind. Really pretty, with warm, welcoming features highlighted by dark makeup, and honey blonde hair pulled into a bun, glasses perched on her nose.

"U-uh, it's okay. Really. I was just in my own bubble," Aquaria stutters out, offering her a small, nervous smile.

"So, what's got you all riled up? A girl as pretty as you shouldn't look so sad," the girl says, her body language oozing confidence as she lifts one leg up on the bench, resting her hand on her knee, her smile never fading. Aquaria's heart lurches at the girl's tone, and the smoothness of her words. She almost wants to laugh. She's totally being hit on.

"You don't wanna hear about my problems," Aquaria chuckles nervously, shaking her head as she looks away from the girl, cursing herself and her stupid awkwardness, trying to force herself to push through it.

"Oh, come on, a stranger in an almost empty art museum? Who better to pour your feelings to?" the girl continues, and Aquaria can almost feel her confidence rubbing off on her as she turns slightly on the bench, facing her more.

"Is this how you pick up girls? Wait for the sad ones to sit staring into space, and then pounce on them?" she asks, and the girl laughs. It's a sweet sound, and it makes Aquaria feel happy, as well as a weird sense of accomplishment.

"Ouch, my secret is out, you're too real, girl. Come on, just tell me one fact about yourself. Your name, at least," she replies.

"She's relentless, a womaniser. She won't give up. It's Aquaria," Aquaria admits, smiling at the girl, who nods, taking in the information, a mischievous glint in her hazel eyes.

"Oh shit, pretty, that suits you. You're that art hoe that goes to small museums with her overpriced coffee and posts about it on her tumblr blog, right?" the girl asks, and Aquaria can't help but laugh at the cliché, causing her to smile.

"This coffee is actually very reasonably priced, you just have to know where to look. True art hoes don't go to Starbucks or whatever shit," she replies, almost shocking herself at the level of fake confidence she's pultruding right now, though inside her heart is beating a million miles a minute, butterflies hitting the inside of her stomach with aggressive force.

"Oh, I'm gunna have to step my game up if I wanna be a real art hoe. I'm Chelsea, the fake Starbucks loving art, I don't know, nerd? I'm more of an art nerd," Chelsea introduces herself.

Aquaria laughs, her name ringing in her ears as she reaches into her bag and pulls out the Chelsea bun in its paper bag, a little crumpled now from being shoved right to the bottom, but a Chelsea bun all the same.

"Well, look at that, my favourite," she says as she unwraps the cake, showing it to Chelsea, who gasps dramatically, laughing in somewhat disbelief, though there's a wide grin spreading across her face, not the smirk of confidence from before but something a lot more genuine.

"Well shit, it's fate," she nods, as though she's already accepted that it's destined in the stars for them to be together. Aquaria doubts this very much, but still, she'd be lying if she said she wasn't enjoying sitting here in her company. It feels easy somehow, and a distraction from her life.

"You want some?" Aquaria offers as she tears off a tiny bit for herself, waving the bun at Chelsea.

"If you tell me what's troubling you?" the girl says back. She's good at this, and it's refreshing, because it means that Aquaria doesn't have to try.

"What, you get off on stranger's pain or something?" she says between chews, rolling her eyes, not quite wanting to tell this stranger her life story, but the offer to not have to keep it all bottled up anymore is tempting as hell.

"Okay, fine, you put up a fight and I give up." Chelsea's smirk is back, as though she knows already that she's won Aquaria over, who just sighs and gives in.

"It's a girl, obviously. We have a long, weird history and I've just kinda realised maybe I like her a lot, and she's way more into my best friend."

It feels weirdly good to open up to Chelsea, to not have censor herself and her feelings, to be unashamedly open. To not have to worry about hurting anybody, but herself, and she's done so much hurting that that barely matters anymore.

"Ah, see, I could tell it would be a girl. I'm psychic," Chelsea taps her skull, and maybe it's stupid, and its cliché, but Aquaria doesn't even care anymore. She just doesn't care at all.

"I just, oh god, I can never seem to get her off my fucking mind. Even this stupid painting looks like her," she says, gesturing to the painting in front of them, with it's beautifully cruel blend of colours.

Chelsea looks at it too, and they sit in a comfortable silence for a few minutes, Aquaria's stupid mind going a million miles a minute, as it often it, though for once thoughts of Brianna have shifted slightly from centre stage, and Chelsea is there too, with her beauty and her dimples and her fucking confidence.

"Have you seen the new sculpture of Venus with her tits out?" Chelsea says after a while, glancing across at Aquaria, who shakes her head, her eyes wide.

"Take me to it," she says simply, so Chelsea laughs and stands up, extending a hand to Aquaria, who takes it without even thinking about it, before being lead over to the statue, which stands alone.

"Thoughts?" Chelsea asks, as Aquaria takes in the intricate detail of the carvings, the hours of work put into it, the beauty of the stone and the strength of character that leaps out at her. And the tits.

"Fuck yeah," she breaths.

They laugh, and it feels so refreshingly easy that Aquaria wonders why it has taken her so long to find her. What cruel master of fate has left her hanging for so long with only the comfort of a catastrophic crush on someone so far away.

"You wanna get coffee or something? Show me the good shit."

"I happen to know a very good place near here," Aquaria grins.

She feels like herself again, _finally_ , and it feels so good to have the old spring in her step as she walks, side by side with Chelsea, in the direction of the coffee shop, and her house.

They've been walking for about ten minutes, with easy conversation and arms that find themselves linked, when Aquaria spots from the corner of her eye two girls on the other side of the street, appearing to be bickering.

She takes a second look and realises with a start that it's Brianna and Blair. Her heart lurches. She doesn't want to speak to them at all right now, not when she's had such a beautiful distraction, so she quickens her pace, practically dragging Chelsea along with her as she hurries to get past them.

"Woah, what the hell?" Chelsea is laughing as Aquaria picks up speed, but it's too late. Blair, facing their direction, has spotted her, giving her a confused look.

Aquaria slows, trying to communicate with her eyes that she totally does not want to speak to Brianna, but it's Blair, the friendliest human on earth. She lifts her hand in a wave, catching Brianna's attention, who turns to look at Aquaria and a baffled Chelsea, now stopped still in the middle of the street.

"Oh fuck," Aquaria mutters, as Blair walks across the road towards them, dragging an embarrassed looking Brianna by the wrist.

"Hey, Q," Blair beams.

"Hey guys," says Aquaria awkwardly, offering a small smile to both of them She glances at Brianna who is looking Chelsea up and down, her nostrils flared slightly, a hand on her hip.

Blair gives Aquaria a pointed look, glancing at an amused Chelsea who seems to be enjoying the whole thing, and back again, dropping an unsubtle hint.

"Oh, right. This is Chelsea. Chelsea, this is Blair and Brianna. My friends," Aquaria introduces.

"It's nice to meet you," Chelsea's grin still oozes confidence, her gaze meeting Brianna's, who is shifting on the spot uncomfortably, her hand clawing at her arm as she says nothing.

"Yeah, it's so nice to meet you, I love your glasses!" Blair smiles happily, her genuine niceness earning a glare from Brianna, which she merely shrugs at.

"Thanks, girl," says Chelsea. Aquaria tries to rack her brains for something else to say to ease this awkwardness crushing down on them, but she's interrupted by Brianna, who scoffs, rather rudely.

"Well, we need to go," she says loudly, taking Blair's hand and practically dragging her away as she offers a small wave before they disappear around the corner.

"I'm guessing that was the girl?" Chelsea says in amusement, and Aquaria groans, embarrassed by Brianna's unusual behaviour, her defensive body language and judgemental tone.

"Ugh, I am so sorry. Meet my friends! They're normal humans!"

"Oh babe, chill. It's fine. Let's just get a coffee, okay?" Chelsea is still laughing, so Aquaria smiles, in spite of herself and that horrible interaction.

Then, the blonde reaches down to intertwine their fingers, and she doesn't protest, feeling comfort in the warmth of someone else's hand, and they continue on their journey.


	5. Part Five - Work of Art

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aquaria and Chelsea explore the city, and each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola chicos! I'm in Spain doing a two week intensive Spanish course at the moment, I've met some pretty incredible people and I'm having a good time, but I am dedicated so I brought my laptop. Even though I had written most of this before I left.  
> Humungous thank you and shoutout to my baby g and one true love Bertie and her bees for writing the smut in this chapter as I know she's been going through a rough time and she did not have to do this but she did it anyway and I love her for it, basically there's a cut before she starts writing, you'll probably be able to tell where because she's a 10x better writer than me.  
> Oh yeah, there's smut.  
> Brianna's not in this chapter physically .. but she sort of is at the end. You will see.  
> Enjoy, and let me know what you think of Chelsea! Do you love her? Do you want her to be your girlfriend and fuck you senseless (like me)? Or do you detest her? Find her annoying? Rude? Getting in the way? Ya gal loves feedback. And don't worry, Brianna and also Blair will return next chapter.  
> LOVE YOU

Chelsea is a more than welcome distraction for Aquaria.

Everything about her is so easy; it just feels so nice for Aquaria to slip into a routine with her, constantly texting each other and delving deeper into building their relationship.

Aquaria doesn't have to try with Chelsea which is what makes it so refreshing - it's always Chelsea who initiates conversations and asks her questions, seeming genuinely interested in who she is, and Aquaria is more than happy to talk to her. Chelsea's confidence and smoothness that oozes from her whenever she seems to be around Aquaria is having a very positive effect on the other girl, who is beginning to feel happier than she has done in a long time.

There's a small nag in the back of Aquaria's mind. Not always, just when she can't sleep at night, or when she's sitting in the back of class bored as hell, but it's there, despite it's tiny size. She knows that her feelings for Chelsea are purely based on the fact that she is somebody who actually appreciates her, and she's unsure if it goes any deeper than that.

But she doesn't care. She tells herself that it doesn't matter, and it truly doesn't, because she's making Aquaria happy in this moment.

It's been exactly two weeks since they met, but they've only seen each other once since that day. The deadline for Aquaria's portfolio submission for the Fashion Institute is painfully close, therefore any and all free time she has is spent slaving away over the final details, her perfectionist nature overpowering everything as she stresses over the smallest of things.

She can't remember ever wanting anything more than to be accepted into the college. Ever since she was a little girl, Aquaria's only dream has been to be a designer, and the thought of another career has never crossed her mind, has never been an option for her. She's applied to a few other colleges for fashion, but to fuck this up, although it wouldn't be the end of her career, it would be a huge kick in the teeth for her, a symbolism of failure for her. She knows its ridiculous, as obviously many designers don't study at college, but to her this is a chance to prove that she can do this. And above all, although her parents are very supportive of her dream they do have doubts that fashion is a solid career, her goal is to prove to them she has what it takes.

When Saturday comes, Aquaria's only mission for the day is to finish her final touches before application closes that Friday, but a text from Chelsea as she's sipping her morning coffee, setting up everything she needs, sways her mind slightly.

After coffee last week, she had parted from her feeling a little giddy, and when Chelsea has suggested watching a movie on Thursday she had been eager to go - to feel Chelsea's hand gripping her own as the thriller played on the screen, her plump lips slightly parted as her focus rested on the screen.

Afterwards, they had gotten ice cream, and when Chelsea kissed her on the cheek before they parted, Aquaria had wished it had been her lips instead, feeling the sensation of the strawberry ice cream buzzing against her own, tasting the sweetness that still lingered in her mouth.

It had been weird, but the last time Aquaria had wanted to kiss someone it had been Brianna, so she grasped the feelings desperately with both hands, trying to push the unavailable girl from her mind, and her heart.

When Chelsea texts her asking if she wants to come over, she dithers, looking at her work spread out in front of her. But, she has until Friday and she wants to see Chelsea again, so Aquaria accepts the invitation, before pushing herself up off the floor and beginning to get ready.

Chelsea is a first-year college student, and she lives in halls on campus at the moment, as her family is from Philadephia. She's majoring in Visual Arts at Columbia University, and although it's a twenty minute drive from Aquaria's house, she doesn't mind making the trip at all, singing along to a playlist on her phone as she navigates through the busy streets of New York.

Finally, she pulls up in the parking lot of the student accommodation, making her way over to Chelsea's building, where she is buzzed in.

Chelsea's door is propped slightly open when Aquaria reaches the fourth floor. Her room is rather small, and she shares it with a rather uptight roommate who has been the subject of many of complaints in her texts to Aquaria. Chelsea is sat on her bed, her legs crossed over one another, when Aquaria cautiously walks in, bobbing her head to the music playing softly over some speakers on her desk, pouring over a sketchbook, a pencil tapping against it. Her roommate's bed is neatly made and vacant, and Aquaria smiles as she looks to Chelsea's messy one.

"Hi," says Aquaria, alerting the blonde's attention, who gives her a huge grin, slamming her sketchbook shut and pushing herself off the bed.

"Well hello gorgeous. Don't get comfy, we're going out," she responds, her eyes shining as she wiggles her eyebrows, wrapping Aquaria in a small hug, which she gratefully gives back.

"We are? I just got here," the younger girl protests as they pull apart, pouting slightly. She thought they would just hang out here for a while, talking and laughing with one another as music played in the background, but maybe she's too much of a romantic.

"Well, we're going on a date. I've not taken you on one yet."

"What about the movies?" Aquaria questions playfully, earning her an eye roll.

"Oh, shush you," Chelsea laughs as she pulls her tatty converse on her feet, carelessly tying the laces into a bow.

Aquaria shifts in her platform sandals, aware of her height over Chelsea, which will only be increased due to Chelsea's flat shoes. But the blonde has a particular aesthetic, clothes that look tattered and vintage, that are baggy and oversized and adorned in faded, muted colours. Chelsea loves mustard yellow, in particular, multiple jumpers and t shirts and button ups and skirts and hairbands in her possession that are made up of the colour. Her style contrasts against Aquaria's own, which she proudly believes is very high fashion, sharp and put together looks, over the top never being a word she uses when describing herself; nothing is ever too much. She loves Chelsea's style and clothes and appreciates the contrast of it against her own. And she must admit, although Chelsea is confident, having a height advantage over her is something she is grateful of, just to give her a boost in the dynamic of their relationship.

"Where are we going?" Aquaria can hardly contain her excitement, and she doesn't want to really, as Chelsea takes her hand and leads her back out of her dorm.

"I'm taking you to the market!" the blonde says excitedly, but Aquaria simply scrunches up her nose in confusion.

"What, with like, cheese?"

"No dumbass, haven't you ever been? They have some really good stalls I know you'll love. Because the College of Arts is opposite where they set it up, they really profit off selling arty stuff, like paints and fabric and materials you can use for projects or whatever. I've gotten so much stuff I use for my work there. Plus, they have some amazing food stalls," Chelsea chatters as they head out of the building. Aquaria's ears prick up at the mention of fabric, suddenly understanding the excitement of Chelsea's tone.

Chelsea laughs as she sees the expression on the younger girl's face shift. "See, I knew you would like it."

There are a lot of people milling around the stalls - couples with their hands laced together wondering aimlessly, groups of friends chatting and laughing loudly as they weave in an out, parents with their kids looking for something to occupy them and get them out of the house, clear art students on missions to find supplies as the busy exam season approaches. It's clearly a popular day for the market - the sun is shining, clearing the sky into a pale blue canvas splashed with the yellow of the blazing sun, yet it isn't too hot that it's unbearable to walk around in.

Chelsea's hand is a tiny bit sweaty in Aquaria's, but she doesn't even notice as she stares around at all the pretty coloured stalls, splashes of the rainbow jumping out at her from every direction.

"Ooh," she whispers, tugging on Chelsea's hand as she spots a stall with pieces of fabric hung up and filling the small space, beautiful colours that immediately make Aquaria's fashion heart melt as she impatiently leads a laughing Chelsea over to it.

The younger girl releases her hand and uses it to run her fingers over the fabrics, marvelling at all the patterns, textures and colours of the pieces, the contrasts between them all creating a beauty in Aquaria's eye.

"And to think I've been going to a _store_!" she says, turning around to look at Chelsea in wonder, who is grinning at her as though she knew that this was exactly how she would react.

Aquaria buys what feels like a hundred metres of various fabrics, taking a long time to pick and choose the ones she loves, swinging the bag containing them around in her free hand proudly. She also buys some new watercolour paints, and a set of paintbrushes because hers are crusty and old. Chelsea laughs at her excitement as she rushes around all the stores, marvelling at the beauty of everything, pointing out random things and tracing the prettier items with her fingers, a gleam in her eye that can be brought out by art.

They stop to grab a bite to eat from a stall selling hot dogs and burgers, resting on a bench in the warm sunshine.

"So, are you enjoying our date?" Chelsea grins, bumping her thigh against Aquaria's. Chelsea herself has got a few supplies for some projects she says she's going to be working on - feathers, old newspapers and a whole bunch of sponges, as well as fabric paints and a load of tissue paper.

Aquaria nods happily, her mouth full of burger. It's strange to her, she is used to getting all this stuff at stores, that people have whole stalls dedicated to random supplies an artist may possibly use. They passed a stall that sold only egg shells, from chickens to ducks to ostriches, painted in gorgeous pastel patterns. The excitement Aquaria had felt when she'd seen it had been overwhelming.

After a while more of exploring the market, the younger girl starts to complain that her feet are hurting as her toes rub against her sandals, so they give up on the market. Chelsea decides the date isn't yet over, however, so Aquaria suggests they go get ice cream from her favourite place, Bueno's, that she goes to with her friends all the time.

They dump their bags on the back seat of Aquaria's car, rolling all the windows down and sticking the radio on full volume. Aquaria rolls back the sun roof, the wind blowing their hair into their faces and mouths with aggression.

Chelsea seems a little uncomfortable for the first time since Aquaria met her two weeks ago, pushing her hair out her mouth in a fashion that suggests disgust, so the younger girl puts the sun roof back up silently, stealing glances at a stony-faced Chelsea sitting next to her.

"I just need to stop by my house to grab something quick, okay?" Aquaria asks nervously, referring to her loyalty card to Bueno's. She's two stamps off getting a free milkshake, and they've had some new flavours in recently that she'd like to try.

Chelsea just nods, looking rather small in the passenger seat of Aquaria's car, her larger than life personality for once sheltered by closed doors, a faraway look in her eyes.

At a traffic light, Aquaria reaches over and places her hand on Chelsea's knee, who gives her a grin at the contact.

"You okay?" the younger girl asks, concerned by her companion's behaviour, who just nods.

"Yeah, I'm just kinda hungry," the blonde smiles, placing her hand over Aquaria's and giving it a squeeze.

They pull up outside Aquaria's house, who says she'll only be a minute but Chelsea's welcome to come in too. She says she needs the loo and accepts the invitation, following the younger girl up the driveway.

"Shit!" Aquaria exclaims as she realises she's traipsed mud from her sandals through onto the spotless floor of her hallway. Chelsea scoffs a laugh behind her.

"Don't worry, princess, I'm sure your butler will clean it up."

There's something about Chelsea's statement, the passive-aggressive tone of voice she uses, bitterness seeping into her words though she keeps her voice light and joking, the use of the word "princess" meant to belittle the other girl which sets Aquaria to freeze in her pace, her mouth freeing from all saliva as she turns to look at Chelsea, who is holding a casual smile on her face.

"What?"

"Oh, relax, it's just a joke, because I'm dirt poor, and you live in a mansion," the blonde replies, rolling her eyes playfully, clearly expecting Aquaria to take it as a joke. So, she swallows, returning the saliva to her mouth and cracks an imitation of the casual smile on Chelsea's lips.

"Wait until you see the pool."

Eventually, after a grand tour of Aquaria's house and wee break, before nearly forgetting the loyalty card and the whole reason they came to the house, they make it to Bueno's, and walk through the doors, hands laced together in affection, though Chelsea#s stinging words are still playing in the background of Aquaria's mind, in a quiet part where not much happens, that she tends to pay little attention to. It's there, all the same, leaving bitterness in its wake and a souring on the otherwise good day.

Out of instinct, Aquaria glances towards the normal table the girls use, it's bigger, round and by the window, where they can spy on innocent passer-by's, and physically jumps when she sees it occupied by none other than Vixen, Asia, Kameron and Monét, who are sitting around laughing together, sipping smoothies and milkshakes and not noticing Aquaria.

Her mind pangs, noting the absence of Brianna and Blair that seems to be a regular occasion these days, so much so that she's depressingly more than used to it.

Unable to ignore her friends, Aquaria tugs Chelsea towards the table, sweat glistening her hand as she comes to rest in front of the table, where the girls look up at her and her friend in surprise.

"Hey, guys, um, this is Chelsea," Aquaria says, forcing a smile onto her nervous face, deciding in an instant she should probably explain to her friends what they don't know. "Oh, and I'm a lesbian. There, two birds with one stone."

"We already knew you're gay so it's one bird," Monét says through a mouthful of cookie, and Aquaria is startled, but the other girls look unbothered by her statement, shrugging it off as though it's not a big deal at all, and she's reminded of why she loves her friends so much.

"I think I saw a porno once called two birds one stone," Kameron comments, looking deep in thought as she swirls her milkshake around with her straw, the murky colour indicating that she's probably not going to finish it.

"That's two girls one cup, dumbass," Vixen tells her, but she shakes her head.

"Nah, it was like a rip off of that. It was really gross," Kameron continues.

"Sit, guys. It's nice to meet you, Chelsea," Asia interrupts them, silently scolding them with a glare for being rude to this new girl that their friend wants them to meet, smiling at the girls, who drop hands to take seats at the table.

Aquaria's friends take some time to grill Chelsea, who seems unbothered as she answers their questions coolly, her humour poking through here and there in her replies. She seems to pass the test, because even Asia, overly protective when it comes to her friends, has leaned back in her seat, a small smile adorning her features. Aquaria had taken her bottom lip between her teeth as the interrogation took place, chewing with such an intensity that she can now taste the metallic twinge of her blood even as she lets her prisoner go from her grasp as Chelsea stands up.

"I'll get the ice cream, what d'ya want?" she smiles. Aquaria tells her, handing her the loyalty card and ten dollars which she is reluctant to take, but accepts anyway.

The other four girls all look at Aquaria as though they expect her to say something. Their expressions hold knowingness and amusement, clearly happy for their friend for finding someone. Vixen's gaze, however, holds a different intensity, something Aquaria struggles to recognise but almost burns her, her eyes studying the girl in front of her, who shrinks under her harsh stare.

"Well, you have a type, I suppose," Vixen shrugs, finally breaking her gaze, and Kameron nods in agreement, but Asia slaps her arm lightly, glancing at Aquaria to see her expression, which is one of confusion.

"What?" she asks, confused at what she's supposed to have picked up, considering she's never admitted that she's a lesbian to these girls, let alone any crush that she's had. Sure, she's sloppily kissed random girls at random parties, but they all have at one time or another, it's never been a big deal

"Well, she looks exactly like Brianna," Vixen continues as though it's completely obvious, shrugging as she looks at Chelsea who is standing in the queue, studying the intricate menu through the frames of her glasses.

Aquaria's whole body goes stiff, her mind freezes and her breath jolts at the impact of Vixen's words hits her like a bullet train speeding off course down a dusty track.

"What, j-just because she's blonde?" Aquaria stutters out in a weak attempt to defend herself, but deep down she knows it's no good, knows there's no use convincing these stubborn girls who already seemed to have made up their minds.

"They could be twins! And they act the same. Are you sure that isn't actually Bri?" Monét is laughing as she questions the girl, who is failing to see the funny side of all of this, her cheeks hot in embarrassment.

Not only do her friends think that this girl she's dating resembles Brianna, they somehow know the forbidden feelings that she holds, _held_ , for her friend, thoughts that have plagued her mind for weeks, that she hasn't dared to utter to anyone, besides Chelsea.

Was it really that obvious?

And if so, why does Blair appear to be dating her, if she claims to be such a good friend? How could she do that her best friend, who has been silently crushed over their relationship?

She's a little angry at her friends, who are staring at her and looking amused, as though they have figured out her whole psychology, and that it all revolves around Brianna. But they couldn't be more wrong. Could they?

As Chelsea returns, two ice creams in her hand, Aquaria stands up, snatching her purse and glaring at her friends.

"Let's go, Chelsea," she snaps, before storming out the parlour.

They must know the effect that their accusations have had on her, because she glances back and all four of them are looking slightly guilty, nobody speaking as they watch Chelsea run out to keep up with her.

She dumps herself on a table outside that she knows is out of view from the girls, and gratefully takes the ice cream from Chelsea, who is looking at her in a mixture of concern and amusement.

"I love meeting your friends," she says, and Aquaria scoffs a laugh, licking at her ice cream, the simple mint chocolate flavour blessing her taste buds in the warmth of the April heat.

"What did you get?" she asks instead of replying to Chelsea's comment, not wanting to think of Vixen's words that cut through her like a knife. Why the hell should it affect her this much, when it's not even true?

"Tiramisu. Did something happen?" Chelsea doesn't seem to want to talk about ice cream, so Aquaria sighs heavily, rolling her eyes at the girl.

"It's nothing, they're just annoying," she says, forcing a smile that Chelsea seems to buy, because it's returned with sincerity, a lightness gleaming in her hazel eyes. Hazel, not brown like Brianna's. She isn't like Brianna at all.

"Okay princess, whatever you say," she says, and Aquaria's heart lurches at the pet name, trying to ignore the way it was used just earlier with more negative, patronising connotations.

They eat their ice cream in a comfortable silence. Aquaria can't imagine what Chelsea is thinking about, but her mind is somehow on Brianna again, Brianna who she has been trying so hard to forget about recently. Who she _can't_ like, not when she's sitting here with Chelsea, who has been nothing but nice to her.

Her thoughts are interrupted by the ringing of Chelsea's phone, who shoots her an apologetic look that says she has to get this.

Aquaria doesn't know who she's talking to, but she says "yeah" and "okay" a lot, deadpanned, perhaps the only thing she says, before hanging up, groaning heavily enough to startle the younger girl.

"You okay?" she asks cautiously, and Chelsea gives her a smile that says no, but she's not going to tell her that.

"Yeah. Shall we go back to mine?" she asks, and Aquaria nods wordlessly. They dump the rubbish from the ice creams and clamber back into the car. Aquaria leaves the windows up and instead sticks on the AC, hoping maybe that Chelsea will want to talk to her about the phone call that is clearly affecting her.

"I'm sorry, I'm just a little annoyed," Chelsea says after a few minutes of silence, resting her head against the window as the vibration of the car judders it slightly. Aquaria glances at her.

"How come?"

"I have to do a still life portrait of someone for a class. But my model has just pulled out because she's got no free time or some bullshit when we arranged this ages ago, and I'm never going to find anyone else in time because all my friends are students and they're all too busy with their own work and deadlines to be able to help me."� Chelsea is ranting, waving her hands around to exaggerate her frustration. The younger girl nods along with her words, trying to keep up.

"When is it due by?"

"Two weeks, which is why I'm stressing," the blonde grumbles, clearly weighing the possibilities in her mind of what to do.

"I'll do it. I'll be your model," Aquaria says without thinking too much about it, her mind on the devastation that Chelsea is portraying, who jumps at her words, looking at her in surprise.

"What? You would do that?" the older girl questions, but her clear happiness is breaking through her features, gratefulness showing in her eyes. Aquaria shrugs.

"Yeah, why not?

"I swear, it's the most boring thing. You have to sit there for hours whilst I paint and sketch you, like a million times because I'm such a god damn perfectionist. You can't move at all," Chelsea rambles.

"Hey, you trying to convince me not to help you, or do you _actually_ want me to be your model considering you won't get anyone else who'll do it for free?"

"You're an angel. Seriously. But you have your portfolio deadline, are you sure you have time?"

"I'm almost done," Aquaria lies. "Besides, I can spare a few hours. I'll just have to skip school, won't I?"

"You little rebel. Do you want to start right now?"

Chelsea is clearly excited, so Aquaria laughs, happy to have been the one to put that smile on her face.

"Yeah, why not?"

They head into an art studio on college campus. There are students milling around here and there, but considering it's a Saturday, not many people are in there, and Chelsea leads her to a free room, empty of other people, setting up her supplies that they had stopped off to get.

"I can't thank you enough for this," Chelsea says as Aquaria hops up on the stall, instructed to seat herself in the position Chelsea wants her to start with, after having explained that she wants several different poses.

As Chelsea begins to sketch, Aquaria stares in to space, soft music playing in the background, but unable to talk to the girl, who doesn't want to be distracted while she works.

Unfortunately, this means Aquaria's mind is wandering into places it shouldn't visit, places that are blocked off with yellow police tape, huge signs warning against trespassers displayed, that her mind promptly ignores, venturing in anyway.

She's thinking of Brianna again, and the words of the girls at Bueno's, how casually they had spoken to her about it, almost as though she had dated Brianna in the past instead of harbouring a crush that she had never even mentioned to her friends.

What is it about Brianna that had drawn her in? Was it the same thing that had drawn her to Chelsea, and are they really that similar?

She'd not thought about it at all until Vixen brought it up, and now it seems to be the only thing occupying her mind, filling up empty space as Chelsea sits across from her, concentration deep on her face as her pencil strokes across her canvas. She wonders if she'll be able to capture the expression she holds right now - confusion, guilt and confliction - her mind going at a million miles an hour trying to process the girls" words, trying to figure out what it means for her, for Chelsea, for Brianna, even for Blair.

"God, you're so beautiful." Chelsea's voice cuts melodically through Aquaria's thoughts, barely above a whisper and let out with a sigh, as though she hadn't even meant to say it, as though the words were meant to stay only in her head.

Aquaria jumps slightly, her cheeks flushing at the compliment, trying not to move and mess up the sketch of herself but feeling flustered at the words that have left her lips.

"Seriously. Thank god that girl quit on me because you are _beyond_ gorgeous," Chelsea is still talking, and Aquaria feels hot all of a sudden, the heat flushing directly to her cheeks. She fidgets a bit on the stool, and Chelsea smiles at her.

"Take your jacket off, if you want."

Aquaria slips it off silently, the baggy denim escaping her exposing a large amount of skin from the small, tight piece of fabric covering her chest.

Aquaria returns to her pose, relishing in the raised bumps appearing on her now exposed skin, and the way Chelsea's eyes surveys her.

"Wow," Chelsea breathes, smirking as colour flushes Aquaria's cheeks thus splashing her cheeks with giddy hues.  "Your body is incredible."

"Thanks," Aquaria beams, sitting straighter on her chair with an overwhelming coy aura, relishing in the compliment.

Chelsea ducks back behind her canvas, thus leaving Aquaria to slump again in her chair, her mind re-wander to the apparent parallel blonde of her current companion. 

The only sound filling the room is the soft scraping of Chelsea's pencil against the canvas, as she works fervently to translate all of Aquaria's sharp, captivating features from the small freckles littering her skin, to the usual glimmer of passion in her otherwise cold, icy irises. Until the noise stops. Chelsea reappears, a flushed rosy tint adorning her cheeks, as she smiles warmly at Aquaria, thus causing the younger woman's stomach to lurch at the sparkle of adoration in Chelsea's eyes. 

"Aqua, um, princess," Chelsea stumbles. Aquaria's breath catches dryly in her throat at the label of affections, causing a pool of heat to accumulate in her stomach, travelling south. "Do whatever is comfortable, but no one would complain if that shirt was on the floor."

Aquaria feels her stomach contract with a soul crushing weight in the gruesome form of guilt and insecurity. Aquaria loves her body, the toned muscle of her stomach and thighs, the small curves of her breasts and ass; she knows it's painfully enticing to men yet she's never witnessed this reaction from a woman before. 

Aquaria knows she has no reason to feel guilty; they are two consenting adults who simply crave to drink in each other's full bodies in it's purest form, there is no solid reasoning for the sinking feeling consuming her as she reaches to untie the halter neck of her top. As Aquaria allows the silky vibrant material to fall through her fingers, letting it settle on her lap, exposing her pale breasts, briefly, to the room, Chelsea's eyes darken, no longer eager to translate Aquaria's beauty onto the paper in front of her, but to have it all to herself. 

Aquaria isn't sure why she contracts into herself under Chelsea's hungry gaze, feeling similarly to a small sparrow being stalked by a determined cat, however she isn't complaining.

"Wow, you're incredible, your body is amazing, kitten," Chelsea smirks, discarding her pencil and moves towards Aquaria.

"Thank you, Chelsea," Aquaria stutters, her cheeks redden thus alighting her cheeks with a blissful heat.

Chelsea hovers above the younger girl in a more experienced dominance, moving her head to inch closer to Aquaria's, before she mutters a short and simple "may I?"

Aquaria simply nods, not certain her voice will survive the sentence, allowing Chelsea to clasp Aquaria's quivering lips in her confident lips, soothing Aquaria in a reassuring blend of soft brushes and little licks. 

Aquaria feels the embarrassment when small moans escape her mouth, vibrating encouragingly in her lover's mouth, urging Chelsea to take her chance, thrusting her tongue in Aquaria's mouth. Aquaria has, of course, kissed many childish boys that have consumed her time before her long-awaited transfer to girls that also had little mature interest in her; yet this feels different. It feels mature and fulfilling, in no way similar to the sloppy stolen kisses in bathrooms at parties. 

"Can I touch your body, baby girl?" Chelsea smiles, softly, comfortingly, coaxing Aquaria to nod shyly. 

Aquaria feels the soft brush of Chelsea's cold hand against her exposed breast, groping lightly and suddenly Aquaria finds herself self-conscious of her body.

"I'm sorry I know, uhh, my ...¦chest is small," Aquaria stutters, turning her face away to hide the ever warming rising in her cheeks.

"Shhh, I don't mind," Chelsea coos and momentarily it all falls apart; the sweet words present a sour taste in Aquaria's mouth, as her mind attempts to decorate Chelsea's passive reply into a statement of adoration. "I like your body, princess, can I see more of it?"

Aquaria would be lying if there wasn't the tiniest whisper of caution cooing at her in her mind yet, as Chelsea reaches for her jeans button she doesn't stop her, she allows her to pull them from her long, milky stretch of legs, leaving her only protected by her lacy blush panties, the light pink harmonising with the pale white of her legs. 

"Wow, these are awful pretty princess, I feel terribly underdressed now," Chelsea hums, her tone teasing as her gaze is fixed upon the younger girls thighs.

"Get undressed then," Aquaria mumbles, feeling a heat rise in her cheeks as Chelsea smirks, leaning away from Aquaria to unhook her dungaree dress and pull it over her head. Aquaria would be lying if she wasn't overwhelmed; Chelsea's body was undeniable exquisite as her ample breasts are perched in a black lacy bra and her round and plentiful ass is adorned with a matching thong, and in that moment Aquaria realises she was not the one who chose to have sex today. 

Chelsea wastes no time to rejoin her lips to an awe-struck Aquaria who lifts her hands to trace the soft skin on Chelsea's wide hips, moving her hand slowly to grab her ass, earning a small moan.

"Well, someone is moving fast," Chelsea teases, coyly, rising an eyebrow at a scarlet Aquaria.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..." The younger, more vulnerable girl stutters, watching in horror as Chelsea's soft giggle hits the air.

"Shush, princess, I'm kidding," Chelsea coos, petting Aquaria's hair in a blissful form of comfort. "Shall we get you out of these?"

This causes a small moment of dread in Aquaria; she is wet, a blissful heat settling in her core, thus causing her to worry about Chelsea's reaction. Despite the worry she nods shyly, covering her face quickly as Chelsea pulls the pink lace down her infinite legs and leaves them in a pool on the floor.

"Part your legs for me, angel," Chelsea smiles, fusing a warmth throughout Aquaria's body, making her feel warm and safe and alive. Slowly, she parts her legs, allowing, relishing, in the soft look of awe Chelsea paints across her face, her eyes studying Aquaria's body.

"Wow, you're such a good girl, Aquaria, shall I touch you?" Chelsea questioned, innocently, moving to lightly kiss Aquaria's lips as she nods her head.

Aquaria feels a light whisper of a hand between her thighs, stroking her softly in the previously forbidden place, that she craved so desperately.

"Chelsea, I've never done it... with a girl, properly, before," Aquaria stumbles, softly, yet Chelsea finds the flustered pout on her lustful face endearing as she leans in to gently brush their lips in a comforting agreement.

"Don't worry, kitten, I'll look after you," Chelsea smiles, moving her hand gently against Aquaria's clit, basking in the small whimpers of desire and frustration leaving Aquaria's innocent lips.

"More, please. Chelsea, please," Aquaria pleads, clamping her eyes shut in desperate frustration.

"Don't be so eager, Aqua, I'm not rushing this," The more confident girl retorts firmly, lowering herself onto her knees and situating herself between Aquaria's trembling thighs.

"I'm going to touch you now, okay angel?"

"You don't need to give me a tutorial," Aquaria giggles, earning a gentle swot between her thighs, causing her to gasp in undeniable yet fleeting pleasure.

"Don't sass me," Chelsea smirks, moving her hand to stroke Aquaria's clit in circles, tantalisingly slowly.

Aquaria writhes and whimpers, attempting to catch more pressure, deciding that Chelsea is far too cruel for her liking until she feels a soft, experimenting thrust entering her body, erupting a throaty moan from the younger girl; who instantly scolds herself for seeming so desperate.

"Do you like that angel? You're doing so well should I add another, would you like that?" Chelsea continues to thrust her finger attentively, waiting for a gleeful Aquaria's reply.

"Uh, yes, yes please," Aquaria begs, which during any other situation would have installed a weight of discomfort for the proud young woman.

Chelsea smirks coyly, slipping a second finger along side her first, curling a satisfying finger in search of Aquaria's source of infinite pleasure. It takes a few minutes of Chelsea's fingers rhythmically dancing, exploring Aquaria, before she finds it and she notes how the sunlight gleams through the window, hitting Aquaria's dark hair as she throws her head back in pleasure, makes her look ethereal. 

"Harder, _please_ , Chelsea," Aquaria's voice rings in the room in stuttered fragments, allowing herself to appear the most broken she has been in weeks. 

Aquaria knows it isn't healthy to disguise her problems in such an erotic manner yet as Chelsea's routine thrusting becomes faster and more sporadic Aquaria allows herself to finally channel het emotions.

How could they do it to her? Everyone knew her feelings towards Brianna, how could they? How dare they! How dare Brianna ask Aquaria to help her, how dare she like Blair, how dare Blair feel mutually.

Aquaria's thoughts were almost as broken as her moans, as her eyes scan down to the mass of blonde curls, situated in her lap, a blissfully bubbling heat spreading from between her thighs, growing causing Aquaria to splutter, "I'm going to cum."

Aquaria could feel Chelsea smirk against her stomach, where her head lays, moving to circle Aquaria's clit with her hand that is not occupied thrusting at a quick pace, curling her fingers thus earning a squeal of approval from Aquaria. 

"Cum for me, princess," Chelsea coos, making Aquaria whimper softly, evidently close as she contracted around Chelsea's fingers. "Come on, good girl, you're doing so well."

Aquaria clasps fistful of the blonde waves in front of her, pulling as she feels her body getting consumed by a infinite pleasure, sending pulses through her body, her toes curling in climax as she allows broken mumbles of pleasure to escape her mouth, however one word is prominent above the rest.

_"Brianna."_


End file.
